A ,
anonymous
writes: I've asked my boyfriend of 2 years to move to a different country to be with me, because we haven't even seen each other for the past year and a half. Crazy relationship I know. But he's a bit scared to make such a big move, and due to work, I can't move to him. He says he loves me, he's ready to make a change in his life, but he doesn't know if he wants to move to where I live and start a new life. I love him, I think we can do it and possibly be incredibly successful together. We've both been faithful, and since he's a writer, he has the freedom to take this chance. I'm a little more unstable, unsure of where I go from here, but I feel like we can figure out this crazy world together. I feel that if we don't make some positive steps forward in our relationship, we're going to have to end it. Love, passion, and desire can only travel for so long across an ocean before being swallowed by the waves. What do I do? Please help.
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reader, Sofia +, writes (12 June 2005):
You have to make sure where you see this relationship going. Do you imagine a future with him or not? More importantly, as he is the one having to make the move, does HE see a future with you? You age would also play a part. If you are at a stage where you would really want to get settled together, I suggest you both discuss either one of you moving. If both or either of you are not sure about a longterm relationship, then re-think. It's a big step to move everything behind and try it out somewhere else with a loved-one. Sounds very romantic but that can wear off quickly and you'll be stuck with routine and every-day stuff. Also ask yourself if you would be able to have a relationship where you see each other every day or possibly living together. Is the reason for the succesful relationship so far because it has been long-distance? Only you will be able to answer that question.
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