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anonymous
writes: Dear Cupid,
I have a huge problem!! I have always been known as "always the friend,
never the girlfriend." I feel really comfortable around guys and have a lot
of great platonic relationships. The only problem is that I while I harbor
crushes on some of these guys, they never want to make it more than friends.
I've never really been an agressive person in the dating department because
I'm really scared of rejection. So I wait until I'm sure that someone is
really, really into me before I make a move. However, all of this went out
of the window when I met someone at college. We work together and have a
blast just hanging out and joking around all the time. He always jokes
around with me and coworkers about us getting together and having a fling or
something. I ended up developing a HUGE crush on this guy, and couldn't take
the jokes anymore until I knew how he really felt. So I called him one night
and we talked about it for two hours. The main problem is that I really like
him, but am a virgin for religious reasons and am planning on staying one
until I get married. I told him right up front so there would be problems
down the road. He was really fine with that and by the end of the
conversation, he said that he really was interested in pursuing a
relationship with me. He said he was really flattered and was excited that I
had made the first move. But, the next day, he ignored me completely and I
tried being really cool about it. Being that open that quickly with a guy is
totally out of character for me. Did I bring the virgin thing up too
quickly? Should I give it some time? I'm really confused!!!!
Confused and Heartbroken
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2007): I wouldnt worry too much about it, the important thing is that you remain a virgin for your husband. My wife did and I can say from first hand experience how important it was and how much it meant to me. Of course , by her saving herself she had her fair share of similar experience with guys like the one you describe. One of her exes dumped her because she wouldnt have sex. I am eternally grateful and love her so much that she saved herself for me
good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2006): i think it's best to be up front with the person if theyreally care they will understand and respect you fro your decision
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2005):
Honestly in my opinion I do not believe so since sooner or later he would of
find out regardless. Personally in I find it that in today's society with
men and women being equal, you dont really came in strongly making the first
move. Some peoples are actually shy and obviously someone will have to make
the move. A person like that I would say either he is two faced saying that
he was cool about it but then acted another way or perhaps there are reasons
for him to do so. My advice would be to confront him on it to see what is
the case before making a final judgement. Of course this is ultimately your
decision as to follow through with the relationship or to choose not to. A
final thought of opinion would be this: Majority of men and women are lairs
(despite that some lies are good and others are bad depending) but
regardless of which it is either for good or bad it is up to us to
acknowledge it or ignore it. We lie because of the situation or for
obtaining our goal. Men would go all out of their way to of course make an
impression on women just like how articles have attention grabbing
sentences. Our words are "grabbers" so your focus would be at us. Whereas
women does the same more or less. Just keep in mind that trust in the
relationship is always ultimately the key, once the key is lost there is no
entry to the love. I hope my advice proves to be useful to you.
Good luck and hopefully you would find the guiding light you seek your
answers to~
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