A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am with my boyfriend for four years and two days before valentines day my 9 month old granddaughter (special needs) suffered a gran mol seizure. She was rushed to the hospital and released on valentines day. During this time I neglected to pick a gift or card up for my boyfriend as I was spending most of the day with my granddaughter. He was very upset and let me know it. I did however buy gifts for his children a week before this all happened so I did have valentines on my mind but was not sure what I was getting him at that time. He acted very hurt ----when I came home from the hospital. He could not believe I did not pick up a card on the way home. In a month prior to this he says he was feeling like I was becoming distant and this just made him feel worse. I do admit that I was distant towards him. Just wondering how others would take this. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, No_Nonsense  +, writes (17 February 2009):
 Hi thereIt seems this incident with your grand-daughter triggered what he was already feeling - that you were distant. BUT that doesn't give him the right to be so nasty to you! Your poor grand-daughter had a seizure and you had to be there for her! How can he be arguing with you about a stupid card at a time like that?! I think he should be ashamed of it. It was very insensitive on his part, really it was!
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (17 February 2009):
Your Grand daughter having a massive seizure is one thing, and I really don't think he's annoyed that you went to be with her for that.
But the fact that you were being distant to him, and then left it to the day before valentines to "pick up" a gift / card, says pretty loudly that you weren't planning to put in any effort, just grab something last minute.
Yes it's tragic that your excuse happens to be a family emergency, but if something else had come up that day this would have had the same result.
I think you have to show him that you do love him and I would try and do something nice and romantic next weekend to show him that you DO put thought and effort into the relationship. And DO want to still be with him.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, The old Man? +, writes (17 February 2009):
 I understand the situation with the grand child, but I also see his point!
You said yourself that a month prior he felt you being distant. Women are notably good about planning ahead, and remembering things. There are gift shops in hospitals, and convenience stores that are open 24/7.
If the situation were reversed, would you have been upset?
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