A
female
age
41-50,
*ustarry
writes:If only 1/3 of a penis penetrated my vagina for 10 seconds, did i lose my virginity? is this close to what it feels like when there is deep, full penetration for a longer period of time? Also, if the penis got soft once it was in, is this "intercourse?" or does it have to be erect? Please do not give the typical safe sex answer about condoms or the "girl, you're not a virgin" answer. IF you do answer that I'm not a virgin, please let me know why. i am new at this and am curious about what I can expect it to feel like the next time i go further so that I can be more relaxed. This is a specific question about whether this is what it takes to lose virginity and if this is similar to what full penis penetration might feel like, and what sex feels like, since I was not sexually active before this.
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (7 May 2008):
 Hi, glad we could help. I want to add that the first couple of times, it was a funny new sensation but if you're properly aroused, it really is a nice feeling. The thing is to be well relaxed and well lubricated. Trust me, once you get the hang of it, it is something very much to be desired! ;)
A
female
reader, justarry +, writes (7 May 2008):
justarry is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks so much for your answers, as I am clueless. It was very informative. U've allowed me to see that it's just not black and white. Thanks for taking the time!!! Especially to the last person, I want to say that your description of what i can expect(or not expect) to feel like lets me know what to anticipate. however, I am now afraid of full penetration, as the half penetration i had was a bit "weird " and i felt i had to go to the bathroom the whole time.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (7 May 2008):
Fron the Merriam-Webster's Medical Dictionary:
vir·gin
Pronunciation: 'v&r-j&n
Function: noun
: one who has not had sexual intercourse
sexual intercourse
Function: noun
1 : heterosexual intercourse involving penetration of the vagina by the penis : COITUS
2 : intercourse involving genital contact between individuals other than penetration of the vagina by the penis
So technically, according to this dictionary, you are not a virgin.
As to the sensation difference, I guess it all depends on the individuals' anatomies, but a short penetration without movement would feel very different from a deep penetration with movement. Deeper penetration feels more 'filling' for want of a better description. I think it's a bit of a case that you need to feel it to understand it, and it's quite possible that it feels different for different people. Also entering a dry vagina is quite a different matter than entering a fully aroused, lubricated one. Again, all a matter of individual sensations.
Hope this helps answer your questions. You might have a bit of a browse around the site and read some of the answers in the 'virginity' and 'sex' pages.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2008): It's definitely subjective, I think you're still a virgin. Some cultures consider you a non-virgin when the hymen breaks. I don't consider 1/3 of a penis for 10 seconds proper intercourse at all, but like I said, it's an opinion. I believe that you properly lose your virginity when you have full-on vaginal or anal penetration. More than a third, for hopefully a lot longer than 10 seconds unless the guy is pathetic. That said, some people feel like they are still a virgin until they've had sex with someone they truly 'love' and almost all exclude rape from the equation. You lose your virginity when you have consensual sexual intercourse in my opinion
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2008): It's not the same feeling as deep penetration but obviously it's close, since there is a penis in you. A bit of a soft penis for ten seconds isn't even close to what fullblown intercourse will feel like (unless the guy you're with is a real dud). Deep penetration (if the penis is big) can feel painful, in certain positions it even feels as though the penis is in your stomach (in my experience). If he does it right it should feel good as well. If it's your first time, don't expect too much, you probably won't get off because it takes time to learn what works for you. If you want to know what full penetration will feel like, go to a sex shop and buy a dildo- it's as close as you can get to the real thing (buy one that's a reasonable size, like 6 or 7 inches, cuz no man will be as big as most of them are unfortunately).
As for the virginity thing- I've never cared about that sort of thing- everyone defines it differently. For some it's oral intercourse, for some it's vaginal-penis penetration (this definition leaves out gays and lesbians entirely), for some it only counts if you orgasm, etc, etc... Technically, I guess you had a dick in you so you can't say you've never had one before. That would make you a non-virgin. But like I said, it's just a stupid label. It's subjective. Don't worry too much about it.
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