A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello,This isn't really a relationship question but I need advice.I have 30 minute lunch breaks every time I work more than a 6 hour shift, which is about 4 days a week. Around my work, there's no where to really eat. We have a Dunkin Donuts and a McDonalds and a pizza shop (which isn't really good at all.)I go to DD's every time for lunch. But lately, there's been an older gentleman (around 50) who keeps talking to me. At first it was a quick hello and me eating then leaving, but LATELY he's been asking my name/etc.But just last week he pulled up a seat at my table. (I sit at the same table every time.) and started talking to me, which I replied in yes/no courteously and then leaving really fast. I didn't want to be mean to an elderly person and I also had no idea how to ask him to leave.The other day I pulled up and saw him getting on his bike about to leave, but when he saw me (I tried hiding and not making eye contact I swear) he got off his bike to go back into the store and order a coffee to sit with me again. I've tried making lunches at home to bring to work but I just don't have time. I'm a full time student/worker.I am seriously getting weirded out and for the life of me, do not know how to tell him to back off. I have gone to McDonalds instead but don't like the food. ): Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (23 June 2014):
 Oh dear god... is 50 elderly now? 50 is the new 30 honey... trust me.
anyway... suggestions to be "rude" is what you need.
I know it won't really be rude but I bet you see it that way.
I would bring a Book... and when he says "hi" say "hi" back and then say "listen this is my only free time and I am working on this project I'll talk to you next week"
then have the project drag out...
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2014): Just pretend to be on the phone. It always works when I have guys trying to hit on me. If you dont feel like holding a phone up to your ear for long periods of time, just use an ear piece. Pretend to talk to a boyfriend. You may feel weird talking to yourself a bit but I find it really helps keep guys away when they think you're talking to your bf. I usually make sure they hear me say I have a bf, then I pretend to hang up. 9 times out of 10 they wont try to hit on me anymore. When they do try anyway, I just let them know im not interested because im a faithful girl :D
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (22 June 2014):
 A man aged around 50 is not elderly. I agree with everybody else, tell him you don't want his company. If he doesn't listen get somebody else to tell him, whether that is one of the managers from work or a member of your family doesn't matter. If he persists after that involve the authorities. Don't muck around, talk to somebody at work when you next go in.
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A
female
reader, Brokenv  +, writes (21 June 2014):
Weirdos get to know your routine. He knows the time you are there, and what table you always sit at. Change your routine. Go somewhere else to eat, change your time (if you can), take your lunch to go. Or put on your big girl panties and tell him that you are not interested in a conversation.
This guy may also be lonely and want company. Doesn't mean he is interested in you than more than a friendly conversation.
The only person in control of this situation is you. So take control of it and do want you are comfortable with!.
Good Luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2014): I agree with the others. You need to be honest and tell this man that you want to be left alone. I don't like confrontation either so i know it might be a bit daunting but at least if you say something he should leave you alone! Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Mark1978  +, writes (21 June 2014):
 You just say "Im sorry but I need to read through some things here (holding up your phone or a piece of paperwork) and have a lot to go through on my break, would you excuse me".
Don't fall into the trap of being too polite not to stop someone harassing you. If he still doesn't take the hint just tell him you want to be left alone and don't want him to sit by you again.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (21 June 2014):
 Get your food to go?
Or GROW a set of ovaries, and tell him you like to enjoy your lunch in peace and quiet. That you do NOT want company while eating or... even easier bring a book. EAT & READ.
Personally though, I would tell him. I don't want company while I eat. I'm here to enjoy my lunch and you are ruining it for me. Might seem a little rude but you can without a doubt word it nicer.
My bet is, that he is either VERY good at spotting girls who were raised to be super polite (like you) or his social skills are not very good.
I'm actually leaning more to the first. Because if you USED your body language to try and "ignore him" and he IGNORED those signs, then he knows but don't care because he thinks you won't tell him off and unfortunately NOT telling him off will only make him be more persistent.
Pretend for a second he was your age and you weren't interested in talking to him, what would you do? Would you still suck it up or avoid him?
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A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (21 June 2014):
You just have to tell him! There is no other way around it. "Thank you, but I'm just not interested in conversation". Or, "My lunch is my private time, please respect that". You don't owe him a thing.
This is how men get away with harassing women. Grow some ovaries and stand up for yourself!
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