A
female
age
26-29,
*weetnsourgumpop
writes: okay soooo..i have been talking to this guy since the summer before i was going into eighth grade it's the summer before tenth grade now, and my mom still wont let me date him.. i'm fifteen and he's seventeen.. its TWO YEARS! why wont she just lighten upppp!?!?!?!?!!?any one have any ideas of how to get her to meet him or just let us date because it's really hard to hangout with him.. we only see each other at open skate because i'm a figure skater and he's a hockey player.. ahhh, what should i do?:/i like him sooooooooooooo much..
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female
reader, Bensgirl +, writes (26 August 2010):
Hey! I had the exact same situation as you. My advice is to gradually introduce him to your mom, just start out by saying your relationship is like being really close friends, best freinds infact. And that your not attracted to each other physically. Reassure her by telling her how wrong physical interactions with him would be, tell her how smart he is how great he is how he's going into college. This will help melt your moms ice and eventually it will crack so that you can spend a lot of time with him. My boyfriend is 17, Im almost fifteen, and my moms a strict one, but she ended up letting me drive an hour every weekend to his house, dropping me off, and letting me be alone with him. It all takes time. But eventually all of it will pay off depending on how long and how serious your realtionship is!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2010): Hi there,I'm dating my girlfriend now (I'm 16 almost seventeen, she's 14 almost fifteen), her parents weren't cool with it for some time. We saw eachother in secret, which I don't reccomend. It's sometimes thrilling but in the end fairly emptying because your parents don't know and it just..meh. It starts to feel kind of fake sometimes. Me and my girlfriend are doing great for the most part though. I think maybe you should, take this from experience, make a huge effort in having this boy meet your mom / parents depending on your situation upfront. Postponing this only adds more time for your mom to think about it, which -could-, not would, but -could- be bad. Have him meet the parents, make a great impression, probably a few times would be best. Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2010): your mom is doing it to protect you, please please try to understand. He is almost an adult. At this point in your life there is a huge difference in your ages and it does matter. He's driving... your not and cant, he's probably having sex, i hope you havent and wont. Mainly she is worried about your welfare and becoming a grandmother. Thats my first reaction. Second why is he wanting to date someone so much younger than him? I understand you like him.. really i do... but im afraid I have to back your mom up on this. If you are still intent on at least just being friends with him then maybe you could talk with her about that and she may be willing to listen.
hope some of this helps.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael +, writes (25 August 2010):
Acknowledge the fact that your mother is right to be worried. Think about what men that age might do, what they might want and then decide whether or not you're ready for it. What you are ready to go through.
Your mother is being a mother, she's doing what she's supposed to do.
I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, Shannon_MM +, writes (25 August 2010):
Reason with her. Whining gets you nowhere, and if she says no, she says no. Then you wait maybe a week or so, and ask again, to make her know that you are serious about this.
Be mature, don't stamp your foot and slam your door. Be calm, cool, and collect.
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A
female
reader, Sunnyxx +, writes (25 August 2010):
This probably isn't what you want to hear, but at your age two years IS a big difference. A lot of maturing happens around your age and it all has to be squashed into a few years.
Now, I can't tell you what you can and can't do with your life, but I'm warning you now if he's over the age of consent in your state you could get him into a lot of trouble by dating him.
If you like him as much as you say it couldn't hurt to wait until you're a little older to date him.
Now, take a step back from this situation and think about it from your mum's point of view; her baby girl wants to date and older guy who for all she knows could turn out to be a wifebeater. Trust me, I KNOW how paranoid parents can be when it comes to things like this.
If (or once) you are both on the same side of the age of consent you can take him home to your mama to show that he's not a bad guy and that he can be trusted. This will also help build your mum's confidence in your maturity since you're not sneaking about behind her back. And it's your maturity that's in question here.
I wish things turn out well for all of you. Good luck. x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2010): How many years are in-between your parents ages? My parents are 3 years apart. And the guy you like is only 2 years older than you. Try telling your mum that you really love him, and don't stop until she lets you, 'cause if you loved this guy that much you wouldn't let anyone stop you from dating.
Hope this helps :)
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