A
female
age
41-50,
*mptyland99
writes:Ok so I have been dating this wonderful man for over 2 and a half years this last christmas he proposed on his leave he has been overseas twice and his most recent tour he just returned from in march. Tonight he told me he needs a break I am not one to mince words so I asked him if it was a break or a break up and he said just a break cause he has things about himself that he needs to fix that he can't do with me around. I asked him what they were and he said that he felt like he keeps letting everyone down and other things like that. I asked him if any of those things pertained to our relationship(he said no)and if there was anything I could do to help him fix these things but he was adamant that he take it on by himself. What should I do should I give him this break that he needs. I am so confused I want to be with him so bad and ive been true to him as well as him to me. I guess I just dont get it. Has anyone been in my situation could I get some advice
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2008): Poor thing. I know exactly how you feel. I am in almost the same situation but I am married and my husband decided he needs to be alone to decide if he wants to be married anymore and to decide what he wants from life.This is what I did...I left him for about 6 weeks and had minimal contact. I eased off on demands, and went on a marriage retreat with him. This has been going on since may and I finally just told him I simply couldn't continue to put my life on hold while he decides what he wants. To me, it is simple. you either want me or you dont. He still couldn't answer...so I am leaving for good. In fact, in about 2 weeks, I am moving back home.Here is what I suggest for you: Ask yourself how much you love him and if he's worth waiting for. If he is, it's your choice how long you want to wait. He may turn out to be like my husband though and string you along endlessly so he has both the comfort of having you around and also the ability to push you away when it suits him. If that happens, I suggest you stand up for yourself and not tolerate that bs. If you choose to give him a "break" make sure you keep yourself as busy and happy as possible. If he wants you, let him pursue you.
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