A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hello :DOkay so my friend has a boyfriend and they are perfect together, however my other friend has started to like him. Both friends are in a huge feud and I seem to be caught in the middle of it. Both of them usually come to me for a shoulder to cry on or for advice but now they're doing it more than ever! I don't know what to do, I keep on telling them to settle things down (think of it as a nice way of telling them I don't want anything to do with it :P haha) but then they just throw a bunch of reason at me about how they can't forgive one another. Her boyfriend doesn't know about this and it's killing me. Should I not listen to them when they complain to me or should try to step in with the risk of them turning against me? Help!
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female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (2 September 2009):
 First off, your friend who's not dating the guy is wrong as can be. Friends' boyfriends are always off limits, always, always, always.
I think you need to tell them both that you're out of this situation now. You have listened to them in the past but that doesn't mean you have to keep on listening. When they start complaining to you, tell them that you're not interested in hearing any more and change the subject. It will take a few times for them to understand, I bet, but they need to stop putting you in the middle.
Good luck. I know it will be tough.
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