A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:We have been together for 7 years and to the outside world, it would appear that we are a happy, in-love couple. I love my husband dearly but 2 years ago, just 6 months into our marriage, he cheated on me. He can't/refuses to tell me why he did it and it took over a year for him to eventually break things off with the other woman. She still works in the same office. I am certain the affair is over now, and he is always telling me I am his soul mate; he is so lucky to have found me and still be with me; and that he loves me more than anything else in the world - but my self esteem is shattered as we rarely make love anymore. I am lucky if it is once every 4 months. I am so confused - why is he still with me (I have asked him many times to leave as I don't want to carry on hurting) if he struggles to be intimate with me. We don't have children together and are both able to cope separately financially - so it isn't for those reasons we are stopping together. I feel broken and a shadow of my former confident self. I now feel worse than I did when I found out he had been cheating. What can I do?
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affair, cheated on me, self esteem, soulmate Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2008): Do you mean that he was still seeing the other woman for a year after you found out!? I am not sure why you stood by him so long if that was the case.
Ask him why he doesn't want to be intimate. Prod for answers if you have to! Tell him how you're feeling which is probably that you don't feel like his soul mate the way he is treating you.
If he doesn't know why then is it you or sex in general? Get him to go to a doctor, go talk to a therapist. Soul mates do whatever they have to!
A
male
reader, hhh  +, writes (31 August 2008):
I think he loves you and wants to be with you for ever but he wont be having any sexual feelings towards you..he would like to have sex with the woman he works with(but wont wish to marry her or live with her,just to have fun only) and live with you.Speak to your husband regarding this and still he continues the same way its better to leave him..
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