A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi I'm a 17 year old girl and I have been going out with my boyfriend for over 3 yrs. In the fall of 2009 he left me b/c his friends told him that he should live his life and experience other girls so he left me but he was at my house everyday crying and missing me finally we got back. I knew I should have never taken him back b/c he never did what he left me to do in the first place. He just broke up with me for the same reason and then he cried saying he wanted me back I told him until he experience what he wants I will not take him back. After we broke up I was so depressed that i kinda hooked up with this guy and he got all mad at me but we weren't going out at that time. He then said he was sry and couldnt do it anymore he needed me and loved me so much. I told him I couldn't take him back b/c I will not go through this a 3rd time. I told him it would be better if he didn't call or text me anymore b/c I want all of him or nothing I wasn't willing to share with no one because I don't come second to anyone b/c talking to him and him coming to see me hurt me to much. I heard he got together with this big slut and it made me very upset but then he texted me the other night saying that he heard I hooked up with 4 guys in one night i told him that I wasn't a slut. I told him that he wasn't suppose to contact me at all and he said he was sry and goodbye. I love him so much and i didn't want to cut all source of communication but I felt it was for the best. He said that he isn't looking for a relationship b/c he has me and when he is done and if I'm single he would like to try again but he isn't ready for our relationship right now. He tells his family that I'm the girl he is going to marry one day he wishes that he met me when we were older when he was ready to get serious with a girl. Just to note: In our relationship we dated for over 3 yrs and saw each other everyday and we never got tired of each other. Did I do the right thing to cut all source of communications? do you think that one day he will come back to me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2010): I'd say this guy is using emotions to manipulate you, and his invasive friends aren't helping.
First of all, this guy lets others influence him so strongly that he broke up with the girl he loves so he could experience others. Then, he gets mad at you when you do exactly what he suggests he should be doing. He wants to hook up with other girls, but he doesn't want you to see other guys. This is a double standard. As if that wasn't enough, he's stringing you along. He's telling you he'll come back to you one day (but he doesn't know when because he's honestly enjoying single life) and he hopes you'll still be single. By doing this, he's sort-of guilting you into not pursuing other relationships should someone wonderful come into your life. He always wants you as a backup, just in case.
I say this guy is full of crap. You are absolutely right to cut ties with him. If I were you, I'd cut him off completely, forever. You don't need to be toyed with, nor do you deserve to.
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