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female
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*eowmixers
writes: This is a long story so bear with me. Basically, I was dating a guy for almost three years and we broke up because he wasn't sure he saw a future with me, we were different, stuff like that. So I picked up and moved out to San Diego and was having a great time, dating other people, met one guy, but wasn't terribly interested in him, but we were friends. My ex emails me out of no where, we talked, I said I missed him and pretty much all the things that you should never say to your ex, but never once asked for him back. I was depressed for a couple days, thought about if we got back together how nice it would be and I really wanted that. Well, a few days later, he called asked some questions and then said "Go outside." He was on the front lawn with a ring wanted me back I said yes, blah blah blah. I had to wait two weeks to leave to get my job and everything situated. But in this two weeks, the other guy I was friends with knew the story and that I was leaving, there was a night I got drunk, we were flirting nothing happened but we hung around eachother a lot after that. The day before I was leaving he really didn't want me to go, we cried. Yeah, I had feelings for him but I loved my boyfriend. Get home and on the drive up I realize I may have made a mistake, what about this other guy, why did I leave California? All this stuff runs through my mind. For the next couple of days I just want to get back to California and I don't know if I still have feelings for my boyfriend. Now I'm with my parents with two people in limbo. It sucks really bad, and I'm sooo confused. If you're going to say do what makes you happy, I don't want that advice, I want real advice. Thanks!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2006): I just wonder how strong your boyfriend's/fiance feelings for you really are? He doubted about a future with you and only after you broke up, changed his mind. If the chemistry/feelings are right, they are right from the beginning. I think that anyone deserves a partner that does not find it hard to choose whether or not they should have a future together. Best of luck to you! Do what is best for you.
A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (24 September 2006):
 I agree with Tiagre you need to weigh everything up and think about what is the best situation for you and who will in the long run make you happy, it's a common situation of wanting what you haven't got your with the second guy you want your ex your back with your ex you want the second guy and if thats the case you will be back and forth between the two because each one your not with you will miss and wonder about if you made the right choice.
Which one makes you totally completely happy? which one does what makes you happy and goes out of their way to never hurt you?
Good luck :o)
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A
female
reader, Tiagre +, writes (24 September 2006):
Hi,
You sound like you had a good reason to break up with your ex, because he didn't see a future with you. Who do you see a better future with, him or Californian dude?
Another way to work out who you prefer is to make a list of all the great things about each one, and compare (don't let anyone catch you doing it though!). Also, who were you more upset about breaking up with? Do you think your ex will do the same thing and break up with you again? Generally if you broke up once, the same reason will probably stay with you as a couple.
Hope everything works out!
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