A
female
age
30-35,
*rianglesRStupid
writes:I am 17 and recently began going out with a boy I liked (who is of the same age). At first he was amazing and sweet and good in bed. He adored me and before the first month was ended I had met his parents and he said he loved me. But then I introduced him to my friends and they said he was quiet and boring. I shook off these criticisms, because I thought I loved him. However, I noticed that he was never able to make me laugh or cheer me up, and he had hit a depression period. Any advice I gave to him to help him was just thrown back in my face. It was affecting me also and I began to get stressed and worried. However, a friend had recently contacted me (he's two years older than I am). We had a thing in the summer before my present boyfriend, but then he moved country. So my friend contacted me, and told me he was sorry for hurting me emotionally in the past. We began to talk and the more I spoke to him the more I realised how much I've missed him, and my feelings for him have returned. Also, he told me that he loved me, but doesn't want to force anything because I have a boyfriend. I don't know what to do now. I'm afraid that if I split with my boyfriend he might delve further into his depression and do something stupid. However, the times he makes me happy are getting smaller. And with my friend, my friend can make me smile and laugh and cheers me up constantly and showers me with compliments every day. But he still lives far away, and he's not sure if he's returning back to the uk soon. He said he wants to but doesn't know because of work and stuff. I don't know if I should end it with my boyfriend, or try even more to get him out of his depression.
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (14 December 2010):
 You can not save this guy from depression. Depression is a medical condition that is caused by chemicals - and you can't fix chemicals in his brain, can you!
If you don't want to be with him, don't let guilt keep you there. Nobody really wants to be sympathy-dated. If it is not working out, then do not feel bad about doing what is best and ending the relationship.
And, just because you end it with him doesn't mean you have to date the other guy. Maybe a little time by yourself wouldn't be horrible? Maybe you need to meet some new people. Good luck, sweet!
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