A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My friend and I have been together 5 years recently he and I haven't had sex in two months. I know he's a heavy drinker and I think he maybe using something eles could that be a problem. He says he isn't cheating and to please give him time to get his self together that he is going through a bad time. Two of his best friend recently died and he's been drinking alot.
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male
reader, Dr. John +, writes (12 May 2008):
 I would not be too concerned about it.
It sounds to me like he is one of those who does not handle pain well.
The excessive drinking and or the grief he is experiencing could be lowering his libido.
It will probably pass. Just give him a little more time and be there for him should he want to talk about it. Doc
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2008): I doubt your boyfriend is cheating, but I'd say he's pretty messed up emotionally, probably depression. Heavy drinking lowers sex drive, and being depressed lowers sex drive too. Your boyfriend needs some help for his problems. He should probably go to a doctor or counselor so he talk to someone about his grieving. A doctor/counselor would also be able to diagnose depression if that's what he has. If he's an alcoholic that should definitely be addressed too.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (11 May 2008):
 First of all, is being with someone who drinks alot and uses something else, who you want to be with. While he's drunk or stoned, can he give himself to you?
if he's trying to get himself together, drinking and using will provide a block in being able to accomplish that. Is he drinking because he really doesn't know how to deal with the issues? Heavy drinking can cause someone to be less sexually active.
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