A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have met a wonderful man through internet dating... we chat for 2/3 hours on the phone every day... how refreshing to talk, rather than text and msn!After 2 weeks he started to get a bit 'fresh' although he said he was looking for friends. I have recently been diagnosed with having genital herpes, so told him straight away. We have carried on talking, and I met him last week... and meeting him again tomorrow.He says we are friends now, and who knows what might happen in the future, but I am finding it very difficult, as I want this to develop into a relationship.I'm not sure if I should tell him how I feel about him as I don't want to scare him off, and obviously my STD will be an offput, whatever he says.Any advice welcome!
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male
reader, softtouchmale2003  +, writes (27 September 2009):
 From this perspective treading cautiously is very important here. He may have gotten "fresh" in order to test your boundaries with him.
A word of advice. If you truly are interested in developing a close, loving and physical relationship with him, then you need to know your boundaries and your own character. Likewise you need to know his boundaries and his character.
Once the two of you are comfortable, and it seems at least on the first level, you are beginning to know each other and are developing a great deal of trust.
You did right by telling him about the herpes diagnosis. I feel terrible for you because I know people who have contracted this and its something that you're going to have to contend with for the rest of your life; and unfortunately so will any one that you become physical with. The good news is that you can be fine, and only have to be careful when it acts up.
However, I think if he truly does care for you, and he knows about all of this, he will learn to live with your condition and respect all of your limits.
If that happens, then intimacy will surely follow and a great deal of care and devotion can develop between you if you two choose to follow that path.
By being up front with him, and always being honest, and he being up front and honest with you, things should fall into place easily and with any luck, the two of you will discover your passions together.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe has lived overseas for 8 years... all his friends are now married, so is looking for female friends that may lead to more over time.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2009): I would wait and see. You just met a guy, i am just wondering doesn't he have enough friends?
Then why doesn't he look for a man then just to be friends.
You STD situation is pretty serious, may be that caused him to say that you are now just friends.
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