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Tit for tat in the bedroom?

Tagged as: Dating, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (11 January 2015) 2 Answers - (Newest, 12 January 2015)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Can someone tell me whats going on?

Met this wonderful guy, weve been on 7 dates and for the previous three hes stayed over at my place, shared a bed and just kissed, he only tried it on once but i was on my period. He came over for dinner last night, he got the ingredients and cooked for me, we then watched a film and cuddled on the sofa, he then kissed me and said that he really likes me, we went to bed carried on kissing then he went down on me which was great, carried on kissing slept naked but didn't he push it for sex.

We woke up the next morning kissed a bit more and i tried to push it for sex, but he went on to say, 'i give some to you, then you give some to me then we're equal and can have sex' i replied and was like ok where did you get that idea from? And he was like 'that's just how i work' i questioned him about it later and he said 'i like to take things slow and dont want to screw things up'

I dont understand - a few hours before, when we were kissing he was saying he wanted to do lots of things to me and he was so close to having sex with me at the restaurant (we went there on a previous date)

I dont want to have to give him a blow job or hand job just to get sex... It should come naturally? I know he likes me as he has told me and hes very touchy feely!

What can i do and why is he doing this?

View related questions: blow-job, hand-job, kissing, period

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2015):

its not a case of tit for tat .

But the no the way you wanted him to go down on you and then initiate sex ..

why don't you start to go down on him and then iniitate sex?

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (12 January 2015):

Honeypie agony auntWell he has said how he "works, why don't you tell him how YOU work? That you don't think tit for tat is a good thing when it comes to sex (or whatever else).

Find a compromise. LEARN to talk about things like this. If you think you are ready and willing to sleep with him, you NEED to be ready and willing to TALK to him about these things, however awkward they may seem.

I don't believe you now OWE him a BJ or HJ because he CHOSE to give you head. Or that you OWE him a BJ/HJ in order to progress to sex.

I DO think not having sex till you know each other better is a good idea.

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