A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I made a best friend at university. But now it's like he's been stolen from me and looks at me differently.I was best friends with him for months, but a while back he started hanging around with someone else in my halls and now it's all about them. Everyone sees them as joined at the hip. It's x and Y not me and Y, if you see what I mean.This has happened to me before.It's like there's a part of me that people come to realize they dislike. Am I dull? Am I unfunny? Is it because I hate football and they've found a common interest which they talk about all the time?!To make it worse he's become what everyone around me seems to become - someone who talks down to me, someone who sees me as the naive one who needs guidance and comforting. I'm the naive one / the young one. But that's a whole other issue. The one people talk about as the nobody.How do I get him back? I don't mind if there's a mutual friendship between the three of us but it seems so unfair. I'm so down.
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male
reader, N91 +, writes (9 June 2011):
 Sorry to hear that mate, uni can be an intimidating place as it is as you've got to make new mates from the off.
If this guy is willing to sack you off and start being off with you then he's obviously not the type of guy you want to be a mate with in the first place.
Have a look around uni for any groups (sports/music etc) that interest you and have a look at signing up to them so that you can meet other people who share a common interest and gives you a foundation to build a friendship on.
Try speaking to a couple of people in your lectures just starting with friendly chat like 'That was a boring lecture huh?' or something like that and introduce yourself and just build on it the next time you see them.
I know it's hard to make new friends if you're quite a shy person, as I'm in that boat, but I hope this helps, good luck mate!
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