A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So my ex of now 3 months told me when we were together that i was the one and that she wanted to marry me in the future and she was in love with me but then its 3 months later and she is already with another person. Is it wrong to feel hurt by this? and is it wrong for me to think that she cheated on me?
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cheated on me, my ex Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2012): Three months is reasonable. It's okay that you feel hurt because you need more time than her to heal. But focus on moving on. She is over you. Regardless of what she said in the past, the past is past. It's time to focus on the present and future.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2012): She is with someone else. It speaks for itself. Its time you moved past it and found someone else too.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (9 June 2012):
 So, she told you she wanted to marry you, when you were together. Then you split up. So, it seems to me, the issue isn't that she is with someone else. The issue is that she broke up with you, right? If you were the one and only she wouldn't have broken up with you. Realizing you and her weren't going to live happily ever after, the relationship ended. You weren't the one after all.
So, all things considered, why shouldn't she be trying out relationships with new men? Or are you saying that she should forever remain single, if she once said she would marry you, yet has no intention of doing so?
You weren't the one for her. You were informed of that when the relationship ended. She's got every right to move on, and if you want to hate her then hate her for telling you she wanted to marry you when she didn't mean it and broke up with you instead. Don't hate her for moving on once you've broken up.
No, she didn't cheat on you. In what manner would this be cheating? But she did lie, I'll give you that one. Telling someone you want to marry them.. and then "change your mind" can be considered a lie. It is, the very least, deceitful. But people are unstable like that, they say things they haven't really thought through or really mean. I was engaged once to a man who decided to dump me every time we had an argument. So I know how much words mean to some people.. some times words are just words. It takes the test of time to prove that words actually hold meaning. And your ex failed that test of time.
Better that you ended it now than get married and THEN she changed her mind about you.
You'll move on as well, in time, and you'll find someone better.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 June 2012):
 Everybody moves on sooner or later, three months later seems a good enough time frame between relationships. I can understand why you are feeling hurt off course I do because you thought she was the one for you so yes you are going to be hurt. But you need to accept that the both of you are finished you have been for three months now. She is single and entitled to go with whoever she wants, you need to let go and move on from her. I really do not see why you would think of this as cheating, she is a young and single girl and same for you, your a free and single man so you need to move on from this and accept that it is over.
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