A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I need help with some advice from some wise people. The relationship im in now is going sour atleast from my view it is. Its almost been a year and In the beginning my bf wasn't as bad as he is now. He cared about how I felt when he acted a way I didn't like. For example, he use to stare hard at other females in front of me. Now he glance but not stare; I dont mind a glance cause its normal. He use to share paying for things with me and buy me little things that was sweet (like 1to bottles of vitamin water). Weird to some but I thought it was sweet to think of me.Now Its hell, he gets angry over dumb stuff. I gave my brother money from my check. When I told my bf he hung up on me. I asked y he was upset, he reply "I dont have anything nice to say. I dont't know who is worse u or him". I always help my family out when I get paid. I always buy my bf things, food, wash his clothes do his hair,etc. I haven't heard from him in 27 hours. I dont want to be the 1st to call cause I feel he should apologize. I did text him 2hrs ago and told him how I felt but no reply yet. I dont know my next step, what should I do? Avoid himfor sometime or just beak it off.This whole year with him has been trying. He has an anger problem and admits it. Im scare to piss him off with the way I breathe (if u know what i mean).When I try talking he gets mad and dont want to talk anymore. He also says men r suppose 2b n control of most things. I don't agree cause if thats so y am I paying for everything? He pays child support and I help him with his kid. This weekend he broke plans with me to c this guys he says he hasn't been around n some time. He didnt tell me those to days they were hanging around the area his baby ma lives. I know only cause I ask and he try to tell I can come the next time. When he gets a text he hides his phone. The phone always on vibrate but he always try to say he loves me when I say Im leaving. Im confuse and dont know whats going on...help please!!!
View related questions:
money, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Renee okc +, writes (29 July 2009):
you need to dump his cheap but, He is punishing you for not doing what he want's you to do. Why can't you give your money to whom ever you feel if you have worked for it. If he is hiding his phone then honey that is a sign that he maybe cheating and as far as seeing old friends he was probably at his baby mama house. He is probably with you because you spend money on him and do his laundry. There is no excuse for how he is treating you, you can do way better than this jerk.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (29 July 2009):
 What's good about this relationship? He sounds appalling. Are you scared of him, with that anger problem?
Look, you start as you mean to go on. He's decided he should be in control--whatever that means. Are you sure your personality won't wilt and die under this kind of strain?
I think a healthy relationship is one in which both parties support each other, help each other, root for each other, and trust each other. He's got you so scared you can't ask him about those mysterious texts, can you? Well, hon, you don't have to live like that. That's not normal. That's a toxic thing you have going there and from what you've written, it's not going to get any better magically all by itself. He has to want it too as well.
Good luck.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2009): Oh, he sounds lovely. 'He has an anger problem and admits it. Im scare to piss him off with the way I breathe'...
Break it off. It'll be his fault, not yours.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2009): Well, I don't know what is going on but I would not stay in a relationship with a man that has an anger problem, thinks men should control women and puts me down for helping my friends or family or puts me down for any reason other than to discuss a problem calmly.
He sounds rather abusive, and guys like this do start out nice and then they learn how to manipulate you and CONTROL you with fear and intimidation.
I think you can do better. He sounds like a loser, he is secretive, hiding something, has a kid with a baby mama and you are paying for everything.
Just exactly what are you getting out of this deal? Except low self esteem?
...............................
|
