A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Long messy story so here goes. Met a guy a while back and he started flirting with me straight away. I thought he was interested only to find that he had made out with my friend while he was flirting with me. He said he didn't really owe me anything and that is true we were only talking at this stage. I ignored him for months but he kept calling so I eventually agreed to hang out with him. At this point I realised what a player he was and thort Id be fine if I can keep things platonic. He said he didnt want platonic and I was confused about how I felt, so I told him Im not into players and that if he wanted me he'd have to work hard and change his boyish, immature ways. Lets just say he is really trying now. Problem is I don't trust what he says he feels for me because of his past and sometimes he says such stupid rude things (he is always apologising though saying he didnt realise).Anyways it has gotton to the point where I am actually starting to beleive he feels for me, and is willing to try really hard to make me happy (I have been very high maintenace because I felt like he wud eventually stop chasing what he cant have and move on but he hasnt). Problem is... I dont think I feel anything for him. We have kissed and I didnt feel anything. I want to be his friend coz on that level we r awesome but physically I cant seem to feel attracted to him. I told him that I dont think we can work but he just doesnt wanna let me go. So I agreed to keep seeing him but I dont know if I wanna keep trying with him or end things now. I have made a royal mess and I dont know how to get myself out of it. Please give me some guidance. I feel terrible.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2011): Let him know that he's trying too hard and its turnning you off. Actually its already turned you off and you'd just like to be friends and that he's causing you alot of hurt and distress.
Let him know that if he truly had feelings for you then he'd be happy to just be friends. End the conversation there and be about your way so he can let it settle in his brain.
If he still tries then I think you should just get a restraining order. Whatever you do don't give him excuses to keep on trying.
A
female
reader, lilgirly  +, writes (28 August 2011):
 it's a simple ego issue,guy wants what he can't get..won't give up on it
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