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male
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anonymous
writes: Please can you help me? I’m 48 years old, divorced, and very deeply in love with a lady of 45 years old, also divorced. I just cannot explain how truly I am in love with her. We have a very special and close relationship but the problem is that she is not really so sure whether she actually loves me as such. She has told me that she is not sure what love actually is and she has asked that question many times, “What is love?” Please can you help her by perhaps explaining to her what you think love is and what I could do to help her understand herself and her desire to know what love really is?
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2005): The idea of true love can unnerve even the most sensible soul. Often people fear that someone or something they love will be taken from them. If your gf's been hurt from her past, perhaps this is why she is questioning what "love really is"? T
The question that "what is love" still has no definite answer. Probably everyone has his own individual answer to this question. The truth is that no one should spend their life chasing ideals of a true love. If that's the case, one will probably fail and miss the real thing, when it hits them.
All I can share with you is my own individual interpretation of love. To me, it means: You are no longer a couple, you are the one, you share one life and don’t divide it. You don’t use the word “I” anymore, there’s only “We”. You belong to him and have no doubts that he belongs to you. It's when everything suddenly goes right, and all the problems in life don't matter anymore. It's when you are ready to give up all your life for him and you’re quite sure that he’ll never ask for that because he’s ready to do the same. It's when you don’t have to talk to understand each other, and when one starts a phrase the other finishes it. It's when you can talk about everything in the world and tell each other all the secrets you’ve ever had. It's when you hate sleeping apart, but when you sleep in one bed it’s still so difficult to fall asleep at all. It's when you start acting and thinking very similar, and suddenly find out that you both copy each other even in intonations.
It's when you see your future only with him and see no future without him.It's when every moment is the right moment to call him, and when you feel when he’s is going to call you. It's when you look at him-the color of your eyes changes and you are sure that he will ever look at anybody with those intense eyes he has only for you.
It's when you both have one past, share the same memories and built together the plans for future, when you are rewriting all the plans you had before he came so they could suit him too. It's when you and him learn all your weak points about each other, to avoid pressing on them. It's a committed, deep, comfortable. Some of us are lucky enough to find it..many are not.
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