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female
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anonymous
writes: I believe my husband has been seing someone else. We have been married for 8 years and have a 5 year old daughter. Thing is For the past 4 months his bills have been showing that he has been texting her on average 30-50 times a day from morning to early hours. She works with him and i have spoken to both of them that say they just friends and he refuses to stop talking to her. I still believe he is seing her although the texts and calls have stopped, although when i initially asked him to stop he went and bought a payg phone so that i wouldn;t know he was still texting her. Which i put a bar on. Please help am i being paranoid.
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female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (15 February 2006):
 His relationship with you should come first. Look at whether you really want your marriage to continue then issue him with an ultimatum - you or her. Be prepared to follow it thru.
I always feel an emotional connection is 100% worse than a sexual indescretion....for example, I think I would forgive a one night stand more readily than my hubby *needing* an intimate *friendship* with another person of the opposite sex. But honey, this is just me! Who knows what I would do if actually confronted with it! It is hard to say.
I do feel that you need to put yourself and your child first. So think about if you want to continue with all the stress and strain of this marriage and then be strong and really deal with it!
Good luck.xxx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2006): Hi there,I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this. At the end of the day you need to sit him down and ask him to make a choice, either he stops seeing this woman in what appears to be a romantic way or you and he get a divorce. Yes it will be hard to give him this ultimatum especially if you still love him but (from experience) this behaviour will only get worse the more you let him get away with it. I know you will be apprehensive of a split for your daughters sake but it's much better to have 2 happy separated parents than two arguing parents (again from experience!). Hope this helps. Exx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2006): I think you should sit down and talk to him and make him feel bad about what he is doing i also think that if he refuses to tell you then tell him that you want a lie detector test and then if he refused that then you know something is up
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