A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I met this lady at a social function. She was the life of the party funny witty and outgoing. She seriously could be a professional comic. We have hung out about 7X since our meeting. These hang outs have been scattered over 3-4 years. Casual Friends. The problem is at our annual party every year she starts drinking all the beer as fast as she can like a race and then before the end of the night becomes so obnoxious, loud, and sprays when she talks. This year was the most I have ever seen her drink. She started telling me things about her abusive mother and how attractive she thinks I am. My husband really gets annoyed by her. When she started up her shenanigans this year everyone left an hour early. Should I approach my friend about how she acts or drop her like a hot potato? I still like her as a person, just not after the 4th beer. What would you do cupid? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2015): I have a friend like her. She's really funny and fun to be around. But when she drinks, she turns into a nightmare. Last time we hung out with her we were having such a great time. We even had a foreign friend with us who had the time of his life and left the country with what he describes as such a memorable night. And part of the reason the night was memorable was because my "obnoxious" friend was there and she is loads of fun. But unfortunately at the end of the night she got all drunk (as usual) and we got kicked off a boat because of her antics. Then we had to nurse her back to her house. Basically babysitting her. As much as I like her I have to keep her at arms length and hang with her sporadically because of stuff like this. But there's this other side of her I like, in spite of her alcoholism. And I can't kick her to the curb completely. 7x over a period of 4 years is not a lot. You see her twice a year. I don't see how that's a problem. Just keep her at arms length as you've been doing. Enjoy her good qualities when she shows them. And just avoid her when she starts getting too drunk. It's only twice a year you see her anyway.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (3 January 2015):
 I think, if you can find a tactful way of saying it to her, would suggest you tell her. She might not want to hear it, she might resent you for pointing it out. But... I do think she is aware of her drinking isn't attractive.
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A
female
reader, Sincerely Yours +, writes (3 January 2015):
 I think she would benefit from hearing that she's bothering other people. It's certainly no benefit to her to not know. If she's a mature adult, she can take it and reflect on it. If she can't handle it and gets offended and angry, it's not your problem any more and at that point you can drop her like a potato.
~SY
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A
female
reader, RubyBirtle  +, writes (3 January 2015):
Since this woman isn't your best friend or in your close circle of friends, I wouldn't say anything to her and I would just let the friendship slide (rather than dropping her like a hot potato)
If it were me (and I do have some casual friends like this) I'd stop inviting her to functions where alcohol was going to be served.
If I was hosting a party, I wouldn't invite her. I'd be happy to attend other people's parties/events where she'd been invited as the guest list wouldn't be up to me but I wouldn't travel there with her or worry about how she's going to get home (that would be another hosts problem.) And I would leave the party early if she started acting up. Or at least I wouldn't spend much time with her
I would not invite her to my home anymore. (Or at least I wouldn't let her drink there or arrive drunk)
I would avoid visiting her at her home for anything more than a quick coffee. I'd have an excuse ready if the alcohol came out.
I would suggest hanging out with her in places where consuming alcohol is not the norm. Daytime dates or places she would have to drive to and from.
I might stay in touch on social media. I'm not one for using a social media much but I guess some people might have to consider exactly what they post if they're "excluding" someone.
Good luck
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