A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok so about 3 months ago me and my girlfriend of 6 months broke up. She said she wanted to be free cuz she has been held down by her parents for so long. Sh is 21 and so am I.so it took a while but we stopped seeing each other and tlking cuz I was getting a little obbsesive. So I felt like I was over er so I went on a date with my brother girlfriends friend. She is really nice and less jealous then my ex. Me and her are now bf and gf but I'm not sure if I can love anybody like my ex. So I knew she was gonna find out so I called my ex and told her. She flipped and said she hated me that I should be wit someone. And two days ago she called me and said she wants me back, that it took me seeing someone else to show how much she needs me. She is having very bad anxiety and depressionand I said I would be there for her always but right now just as a friend. She said she'll never tlk to me again and she can't believe I'm choosing some else over her in her time of need. But she wasn't so depressed and didn't need me when she was out partying. I don't know what to do cuz I wanna be with my ex but I see more of a real future with my current gf. I told her that I don't care what she says and thinls that we will be together again jut in a different time when we can have a certain futre and she said she can't wait for me but I would wait for her. I ave no clue what to do cuz I wanna be with my ex but I knw its gonna go nowhere, and I don't wanna hurt this new girl which might develop into somthing good.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionlol sorry for the double posting I don't really know how to use this site too good.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much for the advice... I just have one more question. So I'm very happy with my new girlfriend, But there is just that little part of me that still loves and care for my ex cuz we did a lot together and she was my first girlfriend. So i have been ignoring her call for the past two days cuz i could stand to hear her cry and beg for me back anymore. I just got out of work tonight when she called me and I didn't realize it was her until i already answered it. I didn't want to tlk to her but I kinda had no choice there. It was her friend and she said that "she is very lonely and is still so in love with you, but she doesn't want to talk to you cuz she is drunk and I don't know if I should tell you but do you wanna know?" so I said sure tell me. She said well remember that guy that you didn't like cuz he was hitting on her a while back at a bar...well she just slept with him. But he wasn't good, you were way better." I wasn't surprise but I just never thought she would go do that, cuz she is not like that at all. And i talked to my mom and sister and told them to be brutally honest. and they said that they think she is lying and trying to get back at me for not taking her back. so do you think it is true or she was just lying? I'm not really upset for me, I'm more upset for her cuz she couldn't even stand the guy and he was bothering her a while back. I don't want her to do degrading things to her body, she is so much better and worth more then that.
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (18 November 2010):
 Don't allow her to contact you, cut off contact that's the only way you're going to move on. You're dragging this break up out more than needed. Either break up with your girlfriend and wait till your ex gets her head on straight...or cut your ex out of your life and continue on with your girlfriend.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYeah I realized it was a mistake telling her, I just wanted to come from me and not facebook. She called me last nigth say that she needs me and she watched our videos and she is so sad, I said no cuz its not the right time. She said then she'll never forget that I wasn't there and se never want to hear from me. In timw will she still never tlk to me? I mean a lot of older women I tlk to said she just wants me cuz I'm with someone, that they did the same rthing and she'll just leave me again. She wnts me to be there for the holidays and then she said we'll see if we should saty together. I'm so upset cuz I feel so bad that I hurt her but she wnted this and as hurt me in the past a lot.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYeah I realized it was a mistake telling her, I just wanted to come from me and not facebook. She called me last nigth say that she needs me and she watched our videos and she is so sad, I said no cuz its not the right time. She said then she'll never forget that I wasn't there and se never want to hear from me. In timw will she still never tlk to me? I mean a lot of older women I tlk to said she just wants me cuz I'm with someone, that they did the same rthing and she'll just leave me again. She wnts me to be there for the holidays and then she said we'll see if we should saty together. I'm so upset cuz I feel so bad that I hurt her but she wnted this and as hurt me in the past a lot.
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (18 November 2010):
The reason she broke up with you is because her parents were holding her down she needed to be free? How about she couldn't handle being in a relationship. Why did you call her and tell her you had a girlfriend? She doesn't have a right to now, she would have eventually found out on her own. Bad move on your part because you opened a can of worms. If your ex was really that depressed, I doubt she would be out boozing and partying it up. If truly depressed people drink, they do it alone.
Anyways, your ex sounds like she has major issues she needs to work out on her own time. If you were to choose her it would be just like it was before, nothing will change. I say stick with the girl you have now..proceed to move past your ex and cut her out of your life for now.
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