A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:HI I found out the other day my partner is having a affair.After asking her about it she told me that it was becuse he was bigger then me and that he was white.She then told me that she loved this person but also loved me.She then went into detail how he took her in different position and the things she did to him.I also found explicit pictues on her phone of them having sex what do i do.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2007): god sake man.
ditch her, she has no respect for you, ''she loves you''....how? by s*cking another man then kissing you? hardly...go find a woman who shows you true love and respect.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAfter asking her why she was cheating on me she told me it was nothing to worry about that it was just sex. She said that she did not want to break up but wanted to carry on having sex with this other bloke has she enjoyed sex with him because of the huge size of his manhood.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2007): I'm sorry to hear about your situation. You've been quite vague describing this, for example I don't know what kind of relationship you have with your partner, how long you've been together etc, however, I think the first thing you need to do is give it a little time without making any rash decisions. You're obviously in shock.
After an initial time you need to decide whether or not you want to work at your relationship and staying with her. This is obviously going to be hard (as hard as leaving her) but you need to get to the root cause of why she cheated on you. What was lacking in her life? Is it something that you can address? More importantly - is it something she wants to address? Does she love you? Does it seem (despite what shes done) that she loves you? Find out why she felt the need to go in to such detail with you - is she angry at you for something? Have you been neglecting her in some way? Emotionally? Sexually? Was it sex for her. Is it more?
In a situation like yours you need both people in the relationship to be commited to fixing the problems and looking to the future, not the past.
Obviously you have a lot of pain about what she has done. You will have that for a long time, whether you stay with her or not. She will have to learn to deal with knowing that it is going to take time for you to get over it. At the same time, you need to know that you will need to work at putting it in the past and not let it keep affecting your relationship.
All the best, and what ever happens, have strength knowing that things will get easier over time.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2007): This is outrageous! Why are you even thinking about her anymore! She used and abused you. Now you are hurt and you don't know what to do.
She isn't worht your time. If she is prepared to cheat on you and then tell you in detail about it then she isn't even worth a second glance.
Ask yourself if you love her? If the answer is yes then you will have to tell her this. Explain that you love her but you cannot trust her so you two will never work. Then get out of there as fast as you can!
If you don't love her then collect your stuff and go!
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