A
male
age
36-40,
*mokey1507
writes:Hi,My girlfriend and I have been living at her mums for the past few months, we are finding it hard to get jobs and the dream of getting our own place seems impossible!We spend 24 hours a day together and it seems like we just fight all the time.. Although we do love each other very much we need alot of help and i hope you can help us..She says that she is going to leave me if i dont really change this time.. She says im controlling and paranoid and always give her a hard time.. I have these problems, i get mad and huffy when she wants to spend time with her friends, i don't know why but even if it's not for long and not even everyday i feel as if i have been mis-treated. She likes to go on to a chat room, which i cant stand because everytime she talks to another guy i always accuse her of flirting.She said that she has had enough of not being able to do her own thing and have her own space, and she hates not being able to do the things she wants even though it's in her house.. So i need some tips on how to change and not be so over protective and jealous and i need to be able to accept that she has friends and needs to spend time with them as well as me and i need to stop feeling so hard done by. thing is, i dont know how to do this.. what do you think is wrong with me and how can i change so that i dont lose the girl that loves me with all her heart ? :(
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2008): This is so common and natural, start by taking an interst and by this i dont mean where did you go, who with did you get chatted up? ask if she enjoyed her night out . make her feel happy about telling you rather than worried incase you freak. When she is getting ready to go tell her she looks nice and when she leaves tell her to have a good night. Be one of those boyfriends that her mates are jealous of because your so cool with everything she does. the last thing you want is to have her go out with the right ump with you. so let her leave on a happy note and just think how special she is and shes coming home to you! Do your own thing aswell, so when you see eachother you have something to talk about rather than argue. i completely understand, i have been in your shoes. its extremely hard to act ok with it at first but it does get easier and you do learn to relax. if shes that special dont push her away by making her feel trapped. stick with it! good luck
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