A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi thanks for the replys to my other question which was "i just want to know why i'm having these dreams and what they mean" they really made sense to me and i can see your point of view and how it does match my life in some way, infact in some ways i'd never thought about before. Ok well i have another question....Well as you probably know if you've read my other questions i can't stop thinking about one of my past female teachers well yes that is true, and in one of my replys i think it was ask eve or someone who replyed saying "you may want to look out for her or protect her" i suppose yes i do because i do think about her alot and one of the things i think about is imagineing about her and her bf in general life and what would happen in there life if you get me. Basically i just think of what she may be doing or have done in general life is an easier way to put it and i would never want to see her hurt whichi i suppose is why it shocked me when i found out about her divorce as me and some others knew that she had been with this man since school and was probably with him about 16 yrs or even more.(its not in a sexual way either and it never has been) I suppose you could say i have an over active imagination. I'm trying to think about her less but at the same time i scared i'll forget her and i really don't want to. I'm trying to do this because i have left school now so she is still at work with kids as shes a junior school teacher and i've left and i keep thinking shall i go for a walk around there just to see if i see her-(i don't talk to her or even look at her in anyway) as i don't know why but i think it might make me feel better just seeing her from a distant as i won't see her in the holidays and then i'll be at college. I know that may sound weird but believe me i find it weird that i feel this way. I feel like i just really need to see her from however far away it may be. I suppose i just really miss her and wish we'd got on more when i was at that school 5 years ago(yes its thats long ago)Do you think it would be a good idea for me to do that? I don't think she even recognises me much anymore although i think she did when i went to that school on work experience and when i saw her and some other teachers n a pub/restuarant once when i was with my mum and i don't acknowledge her in any way. Any ideas on how to stop thinking about her? I don't have a bf and don't want one yet but i don't see how it would make a difference if i had one as i don't fancy her i just really really really miss her. I don't think she'll ever go out of my life but at the same time i don't wanna forget her. Hope you understand me. Thanks for the advise so far you are helping please help with this one. I'm sorry its so long like all my other posts have been but i think its better to provide the info so ou understand than to having keep posting back.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, LauraE +, writes (6 July 2007):
This is a tricky question. I don’t think you should try to see her. If you saw her once, it wouldn’t really help you get over this, you would just want to do it again and again. You don’t want to freak her out do you? So best to leave her be.
If you are still thinking about her after all this time, it is because you have a gap in your life. You are trying to fill the gap by thinking about her, and her life. It’s easy and comforting to think about someone else’s life instead of your own. The answer is to fill your life with other things. Boyfriends are good for this, because they involve a commitment of your emotions which would definitely stop you wanting to think about anyone else. As you can’t just whistle one up, it’s good that there are plenty of other ways to enjoy your life. Having good, close friends for starters, going out, gossiping, shopping, whatever you enjoy. I think being at college should help, but you need to help yourself by trying to get involved in other things - go out, have a laugh. Each day of the holidays, plan to do something that you will enjoy that will take your mind off her. Keep doing this every day and you will gradually get over this.
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