A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I am not even sure why I am writing; maybe I just need some kind of assurance toward the situation, but I am still in love with my ex boyfriend with whom I had ended things last May. Even though we had only been dating three months in our long distance relationship (about seven hours), the relationship was very serious, and both of us were deeply in love. I had even lost my virginity to him. The reason why I broke up with him was because he had an alcohol problem, and I felt as if he wasn't the man I once knew. Immediately after I regretted it and thus started a year of confusion, depression, and hopelessness. I still love him, and he still keeps in contact with me, even though he has a new girlfriend. Every once in a while we'll have a deep conversation in which he tells me that I was great and amazing, but that the distance made it not work out for us. He's even admitted to me that he isn't happy. Do you have any advice toward the situation? Is this normal for me to still be in love with this guy a year later?
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broke up, long distance, lost my virginity, my ex Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (5 May 2008):
Have faith... things will work itself out in your favor!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for the advice. It's just hard to keep accepting it's over, even though I was the one who ended things. He admits he has an alcohol problem, so I know I was right breaking it off, but it still doesn't make it any easier. We'll just have to wait and see what the future holds.
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A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (3 May 2008):
Alcoholism is a serious problem. If indeed he is an alcoholic, then I think you made a good choice in breaking it off with this guy. Granted, you may have strong feelings for him, but you've got a lot going against you -- the distance, the fact he's already got another relationship now. I would add that if you lost your virginity to him, it's not too surprising you've still got an emotional attachment to him. I think you should trust your original feelings for breaking it off. You might be a little lonely right now, but there are others waiting for you to find them.
Best wishes!
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