A
female
age
41-50,
*ola76
writes:I am a 33 year old virgin. I have never had a boyfriend, only dated casually. The reasons for this are several... the most important one is that I am overweight so I feel too self conscious to get close with a man. I have had several men try and date me but I always cut it off before anything can get off the ground. I always assume people are not attracted to me and I know that I have cut off people who are. Now I am ready to date more men and get intimate when the time is right. I am worried about having to tell someone that I am virgin at this age! Do you have any advice?
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never had a boyfriend, overweight Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2009): Virginity is for sure a big thing at a certain age. It's huge for adolescent girls, for obvious and appropriate reasons. It's important for some men, sometimes for cultural reasons, sometimes for personal reasons (like not having to worry about being compared!).
For people of your age, in their early 30s, honestly I can't imagine that virginity is an issue. What's important is that you find someone with whom you make a connection, where is just feels right to take the relationship to another level. It doesn't matter what has or has not happened before -- if it's right, if you're sure, then go for it. If he's a good guy, he'll feel honoured.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2009): Hi
Try and stop worrying about been a virgin or fat...just enjoy the fun of relationships and love... /fat thin /virgin /slut /these are all labels and none really mean anything. Sex is good for you...don't miss out anymore..get your sexy knickers on..then rip them off! or better still let him do it.
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A
male
reader, DLover  +, writes (25 March 2009):
Nothing forces you to tell anyone you are a virgin... However, it would be a good idea that you discuss it before you do it for the first time (do not discuss it on first date...). Like damluvaam said, women really judge themselves very hard.
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