A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am an Indian girl of 24. In India, kids stay with their parents all their lives. Ofcourse the girl child stays with her parents only until she gets married and then stays with the husband and inlaws. Now my problem is that my mother passed away 12 years back and my dad remarried. He has a daughter from the second marriage. But his wife doesn't like me. She thinks I am going to cheat her off her rights. I dont know why she thinks that or how she thinks I am going to do it. See, she is illiterate and I am a post graduate. But she makes mine and my father's life miserable by cooking up something or the other every few days. Like the time she locked me out of the house when my father was out on a business trip, and I had to spend the night at my best friend's house ( a girl) and then when my father came back she told him I stayed at some guys place. ( I am not allowed to date and in our tradition we get arranged married. We remain virgins till we get married :)) I know its sad to be so backward in this age but well! society learns at a very slow pace. Anyways this isn't my problem. I dont care how she treats me, but she doesnt treat dad any better. She yells and throws tantrums and doesnt care for him one bit. But Dad wont leave her because of my kid sister. He is concerned and says she deserves both parents. and I agree. I am scared of moving out of dad's house (I have been thinking of this for a long time) as I am worried he will be lonely with no one to even share his grief with. And who will take care of him??? I am not sure many of you will even understand what I am trying to say as I know staying with parents and taking care of them in their old age is not a culture that exists in many places but for those who do, can someone help me find a way to deal with this extremely stuboorn wife of my dad's. I am even more concerned because she teaches the same rubbish to her daughter, my kid sister, whom I love very much, and all this will just ruin her life. She is turning into this really nasty person her mom is. I wish I could do something about this. She is a very smart kid but talks rudely and has become stubborn. She even throws tantrums just like her mum. Help please.
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female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (11 January 2010):
Do you not have any other family members in the extended family to come and talk to her? Like maybe your father's brothers or their wives or some of your older cousins. They should come and all with a united voice tell her that if she keeps acting like a nasty bitch then they are going to chase her out. Tell your uncles about the situation so they can visit and speak to both your father and step mother. Also, I know you are not supposed to disrespect your step mother but one day when your father travels again, bring your friends over and tell her to pack her stuff if she ever treats you badly again. Tell her your friends are there to help her pack!!
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