A
female
age
,
*auraK1961
writes:I've been dating R for 3+ months. We have had a lot of fun together, but the more time that has gone by, the less enthusiastic I'm feeling. Now after the holidays, I feel hurt and angry and disappointed.I am ill with chronic fibromyalgia and struggling to survive on disability; I was completely upfront with R about this from the very beginning. He said he was okay with it, and was pretty good about being concerned and making sure that whatever we were doing wasn't too taxing on me. He has been very affectionate with lots of hugs, hand holding and kisses. He is not a good listener, nor does he seem to ever be willing to compromise - we do what he wants to do most of the time even if I express my wishes clearly - not subtly.He got "sick" right around Thanksgiving, but refused to go to the doctor for more than 2 weeks. He canceled plans at the last minute with me two weekends in a row, but continued to call everyday and stay in touch. Then he invited me to his home to stay overnight the weekend before Christmas. His home is truly filthy dirty and a complete mess which can't be healthy to live in with such a bad "cold." I am a very neat, tidy and clean person which he is aware of as he's been to my home many times. Additionally when I was there, he was outside with the dogs with no coat on, in the snow, barefoot. He then wondered why he was sick still. We were to spend Christmas Eve and Christmas day together, but he canceled on me again, and again at the last minute, because he was so sick.We talked about Christmas gifts several times beforehand, and I explained that my gifts to him would be small, but that I wanted to give him at least a little something. I burned him a CD and spent a number of hours knitting him a scarf in his favorite color, blue. He got me nothing - not even a card. Now after calling me everyday for the past 2 months and promising to call me yesterday, I've not heard from him in 2 days even though we were to have plans today.So is it worth trying to talk it through with him or would you be finished with this?
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female
reader, LauraK1961 +, writes (1 January 2010):
LauraK1961 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you, CaringMan and QuirkLady...
I agree with you both. There are other things, such as him not telling his family about me, and me having to be quiet when he was on the phone with them...weird!
Thanks again and Happy New Year!
A
female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (1 January 2010):
 Eh, it doesn't sound like it's working out between you two. He doesn't seem to respect your time at all and his unwillingness to compromise sends up a huge red flag.
I agree that you should move on. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (1 January 2010):
To be honest, he just doesn't sound like he's all that into you. I think you can afford to move on and find someone else to be honest.
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