A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I live, usually, far away from the city. We don't see many visitors out there.But I've just moved to the city to study. And I'm staying in the University accomodation. My parents have gone back home now. So my question is, what's the best way to make new friends when you know no one. When I went to high school back home there were a few people I knew. Before that I did school via a radio link up in the first seven years. But no one from my area is at this University. So how do I make friends with complete strangers at University?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2013): thank you for such amazing answers.
WiseOwl I do have a bit of low self eseem. Like the hair idea thx.
R1 I will take your advice and join in
DirtBall I don't mind having fun, but so far I've never tried alcohol, so but worried about that. The rest of your advice was good, thank you.
Laura Aimee i could really relate to your advice.
And I think I could join some things. I've been studying all the stuff on all the clubs and things I could join.
Thank you everyone
A
female
reader, Laura-Aimee  +, writes (2 March 2013):
You can make friends so easily. I am currently in my first year of university and I have made some amazing friends. First of all talk to people in your lectures, interact with them, try and join in with their plans or make plans with them and by talking to them and going places with them you can create bonds.secondly go to parties and meet new people. Be confident and don't be afraid to be yourself. That is the most important thing.Thirdly, join as many societies and clubs as you can this will give you a whole new circle of friends.Don't be afraid, you will find friends. University is the scariest place at first because its all new and everyone is trying to be popular and trying to fit in but you will find the people you want to hang around with. Just be open and friendly and you will be fine. See it as a positive to make new friends not a negative. Meeting new people is what makes life interesting. I hope it works out for you.
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A
male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (2 March 2013):
 It's tough at first, but is a great life experience that will help you going forward.
When I was in college, I found a few ways of making friends. One way was going to parties. Lots of fun and the alcohol often helps you lose a little of your nervous apprehension toward meeting and talking to new people. It's also not a bad plan to look for study groups and such from your classes. It gives you a common ground to start on and often conversation will not stay simply on your studies, giving you a chance to meet new people. Joining a club or cause you're interested in is also a good way to meet people who share your interests and passions.
Don't worry though, it might not happen over night, but it will happen eventually. Often it takes a while to get settled in and make those solid friendships. You just need to be open to them when those opportunities come.
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A
female
reader, R1 +, writes (2 March 2013):
 Chat to people on your course - people you sit next to or are paired up with. Ask them questions about the work maybe or make a joke about something that happens... Join clubs - uni clubs are great and the best way to meet people. Sign up to try something new (you don't need any experience for most clubs) or stick to something you already like. Go to events, activities, anything! The more you are out the more friends you will make!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2013): Back in my day, a simple; "What's your major?" usually started up a conversation. That or, "So. where are you from?" Think about it, Everyone else that is attending University is most likely just as confused and feeling alone as you are and are longing for a friend or at least a conversation.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2013): This is an easy question. There are always lectures and study groups on campus. Attend games and other school- sponsored activities. Try and get a job on campus, this is great exposure. Sharpen and hone your interactive interpersonal skills and just open up to people. You may be a little shy or isolated, so people may feel you're unapproachable. If you have a campus cafeteria, eat there and start small talk with a friendly face. You'll make connections through more outgoing personalities on campus.Often, people who are shy have self-image issues or a low self-esteem. This shows in your body-language and facial expressions. So people may veer away from you to avoid making you uncomfortable. Make sure when you receive a smile that you return it. That doesn't mean walk around like a Cheshire Cat and weird everyone out. Just show a little confidence. How? Stand straight and tall, chin up, chest out and a little swagger or sway in those hips! Swish those long tresses and embrace your femininity.You're just a fresh face on campus. It's only a matter of time before guys start hitting on you. Get a fresh updated hairstyle and give yourself a little ego-boost. Don't worry about how you are perceived by other people, most of the time it's more in your head than it is in reality.You're a small-town girl just moving to the city. You are experiencing what all freshman feel, with some exceptions; of course. If you're just not that outgoing, don't sit and wait for people to come to you. You have to reach out. Don't worry if you don't get the response you want, there will be a few snobs. That comes with the territory. That by no means reflects on you at all, snobs are self-important jerks who think beauty or smarts makes them better than everyone else. That is also an insecurity. They need props to pump up their egos; you are just shy and need a little prodding to become a part of the social scene.Chat with classmates and ask what's going on. They'll let you know what activities are available that may suit your personal interests. Don't feel left out; because you'll make friends sooner than later! Good luck!
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