A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been sleeping with my best friends younger brother for over a year now. No one knows about us. It started with simple back and shoulder rubs and went from there with him making the first move. I really like him and I'm not sure what to do. We don't see each other all the time because we don't want his sister to find out, we both no it would cause a huge family fight. When he comes over he always sleeps in my bed with me (the sister trusts us not to do anything) he touches me when ever he can, weather that be a rub on my leg or pinch on my ass. I am turning 23 and he is turning 21 I have to questions that I need help with, the first is I want more but I don't no what to or how to go about it without causing a huge fight and the second one is do u think he is really into me or just wants the casual sex? We don't talk on the phone but when we do get time alone after everyone is asleep we both don't want each other to leave... We have briefly spoken about it a few months ago because I wanted to stop as I realized it didn't feel just like sex anymore and I didn't think he wanted anything other then that but now I'm not sure. I haven't been able to get him alone to talk about it the last few times...
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank u for taking the time to reply, I don't want to look like an idiot asking what he wants out of it bu I no I will eventually have to ask. I was sorta hoping that if I new a few signs that he is more interested it would save me feeling stupid asking. He hasn't had a girl friend in like 3yrs but was having a few one nighters with a mutual friend of me and his sisters. When I'm with him he doesn't show much interest in other girls but glances at me secretly. It has only been in the past month or so that he will come over but not stay the night some nights but even then 6 months ago we wouldn't touch each other unless we new we were staying over at each others place. Now, recently, he will come over with my best friend and the moment we get a moment a lone he will do little gestures like I mentioned before. I don't no if it is worth opening up that can of worms though....
A
male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave  +, writes (18 March 2011):
You are playing a dangerous game here and you are aware of the problems it can cause.
Secrets don't last forever and it will come out eventually.
The answer to both of your questions is you need to talk to him. It's been a year now and you need to ask him what he wants out of this.
Ask him if he just wants to keep the casual sex or if he wants more out of it and whichever the answer, between you two, you have to decide what you think the appropriate action is.
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