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male
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*irewalker5242
writes: About 6 months ago my wife and I hit a hard place in our marriage. I am stationed overseas and she is back home in the states. We've only been married 2 1/2 years but been together for 4 years. I've never cheated and never would but I fear that she might be. She says she doesn't have any feeling for me anymore and when I came home for mid-tour we made love only 3 times (in 30 days) all when she was drunk, otherwise she didn't want to. She said she didn't have any sexual desire. I am in great health and told often that I am a good looking guy. I don't ask anymore how she feels for me because she just gets mad and irritated with me for wanting to know how she feels. She likes to go to the clubs and drink with the girls and I've been told by my friends they see her in the clubs hanging all over guys and she denies it and hides many things from me. What is happening to my marriage? I am so dedicated to her that I feel like I've failed her somehow. Help!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2005): Dude,You did not fail her. She failed you. Let me tell you a story. I have an ex-friend, who is in the same situation as your wife. She goes to clubs all the time and hooks up with other guys. Her husband has no idea that she has had 2 boyfriends on the side ever since they got married and he got stationed at Iraq. They've also been married for 2.5 years. Whenever her husband comes home, she always tells him that she has no "sexual desire" either. And that she no longer has feelings for him. Anyway, before I divulge even more, all I can give you is that you have to go with your gut. If you have a funny feeling about your situation (i.e. your wife may be cheating on you), hire a Private Investigator. You deserve to know the truth. If you can't get it from her, you have to go get it yourself. Good Luck.
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reader, becky05 +, writes (10 July 2005):
You have to tell your wife how you feel about this,even if she does get cross. Tell her that you feel that this is causing a big problem in your marriage. If she wont isten, or doesnt care, perhaps its time for you to move on.
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