A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I was going out with my ex for two and a half years and for the last year it was nothing but terrible arguments that we just couldnt resolve no matter what we tried, so we decided to break up. Its been two and a half months since the break up and although all we did was argue i miss him so much. I'm still happy and enjoy everyday but I feel as though i'll never want to be with anyone else and i will think about him everyday for a long time. I worry im taking too long getting over him because my freinds say its been ages since we broke up and are surprised that im still missing him. Should i be moving on by now? and is it normal to still think about him everyday despite it being over two months since i last saw him? Also, does anyone have any advice or encouragment for getting over such a long relationship, or even personal related experiances? Thanks x
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2010): There are NO rules for getting over anyone special, we are all different. Eight weeks is nothing at all time wise after a 2.5 year relationship, even with arguments the last year.
He was part of your life and you, so of course you will think about him, there would be more to worry about IF you didn't, as that would show you hadn't really bonded, let him, or worse still you had a clinical personality, where you don't emotionally get close.
TOO MANY PEOPLE think and believe,you have to put people in the past when you are no longer with them, and you should move from loving someone to not overnight - this is not possible for people, those that try end up with lots of emotional baggage not dealt with. Just be yourself, and let it take it's natural journey..research has shown for every year we are with someone it takes half as long to be completely free emotionally. So for you that would mean about a year, there abouts.
This doesn't mean you walk around not enjoying life, or being really depressed all the time, just that person is still part of you, and you still feel something, and think of them every so often.
I think it's a healthy sign that you still think about him, it shows you did really care, and please don't be rushed by people, you will feel FREE from thinking about him, when you're ready.
And you will love again...you will feel all those lovely feelings, just don't rush yourself!
Take care,
Jilly
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