A
male
age
41-50,
*eosmith
writes:Should you remain friends with your ex after they cheat on you?After 4 years of being in a relationship with my girlfriend. She met a guy a work. She went out to lunch with him and kept it from me. After 2 weeks she told me about it. My girlfriend told me that she and this guy are just friends. So I trusted her. She started spending more time with him. She started avoiding my calls and pretended to be busy while on the phone with him. I started telling her that they are getting to close. So got defensive when I told her this. Suddenly she sent nude pictures to him after 30 of knowing him. She lied about everything and got mad when I showed her proof. After cheating she wanted to remain friends. How can she ask something like that knowing how she treated me? How can she show no emotions and act if nothing happened?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2007): its hard to make that decision, u were in a relationship with this girl for a long time and she hurt u, however i dont think u should shut her out completely but take a good few months for yourself to try and get over it and move on only then will u be able to appreciate her friendship. But be careful u dont fall for her again it will only make u confused and u may end up in a worse situation than u are already in x
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2007): If you want to be friends with someone who lies to you go ahead. I don't think you do. She isn't girlfriend worthy and she isn't friend worthy either. It might do you good to tell her that.
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A
female
reader, lahainaKat +, writes (13 February 2007):
 Aloha Dude, my very best friend is my X. I wouldn't have it any other way. Why shouldn't we be able to be friends with our exes, that's how we all start.... as friends. You just have to go with the flow of what life dishes out to you. Don't lose a best friend just because they are an X........Aloha Kat
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A
male
reader, Dr. John +, writes (13 February 2007):
 You have been hurt.
It would be very difficult for me to carry on a friendly relationship with someone that has hurt me like that.
However, I have known many that are perfectly willing to be friends with the offending party.
In many cases it depends on how deep the wounds go and how quickly they heal.
It could be that you will not feel as friendly now as you may in say six months.
Only you can be the judge of that and therefore you are the only one that can make that decision. Doc.
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A
male
reader, Ponungalungb +, writes (13 February 2007):
 She wants to keep you "waiting in the wings", just in case the new guy doesn't work out. Move on and forget about her. She's not worth your sweat and tears.
You say, "How can she show no emotions and act if nothing happened?" She's a woman. That's how they roll. LOL.
Just kidding ladies . . .
Fingers crossed.
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A
female
reader, LISAG +, writes (13 February 2007):
 She is only offering you the "friendship card" because she feels guilty - nothing else. You must move on and put her behind you no matter how hard that seems. She's just trying to break your fall. Move on, youll find someone better in time I know - words of experience talking here ! Everyone on this earth suffers what youre feeling right now somewhen or other - youre not alone friend ! It just makes you stronger and wiser next time round! Have faith you will get on in time and look back and have realisation! I'll even have a bet on it ! ;-)
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