A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Should a guy who fakes interested in a girl just to use the girl for sex be forgiven? What happens to a girl when that happens to her? I want to how a girl is thinking that it happened to. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2011): Pretending to care about a girl just to try to use her for sex is one of the cruelest things that you can do to a person. How can you look yourself in the mirror doing that? Do you have a daughter? Imagine if that was done to her? No way. You do not deserved to be forgiven. I feel sorry for the girl you did this to. I'm sure she's devastated that you tried to use her for sex but she's probably more devastated that you played on her heart and love for you thinking that you was her friend or bf only to find out you gave a shit about her existence. Do you seriously think what you did should be taken with a grain of salt? Where is your humanity? How could you betray that girl's trust and belief in you. You outright did the cruelest cold hearted shit that you can do to a girl. You are a disgusting lowlife greasy bastard. No good's going to come to you. My wish is that some girl break your heart so bad you lose your damn mind. You're a dirty rotten evil bastard!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2011): Your concern shouldn't be getting her forgiveness because that the least issue at hand. It's getting her to trust you and respect you again as a human being. You strung her along with pure lies and deceit to making her believe that you cared about her as a person when you didn't give a crap about her existence as a person just to use her for sex. If that was done to me I'd could never trust you again and I could never respect you again. The worst thing you did was play on her feelings and betray her trust. I'm sure she spits on you now. Let it go. You screwed yourself and lost a good friend.
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A
female
reader, BettyBoup  +, writes (19 March 2011):
 Well if she bought into your deception and/or genuinly liked you and wanted something "romantic" to happen between you, as opposed to "just sex", I bet she would feel very hurt and disappointed to realise you only wanted her for sex, and she could well be angry that you lied. So depending on how long this was going on for, she would probably be upset at first and feel disappointed, let down and sad that the guy she was developing feelings for turned out to be a lying ass. But then after a while, she would get over it and move on, again depending on how long it went on for this could be a quick transition or she could feel hurt for a while. It also depends on what her expectations, hopes and feelings for you were. If she had her heart set on you, she could be gutted. Then again, if she knows her worth, and wasn't "that" into you she may get over you easily.Totally depends on the girl and the situation. You gave vague details so it's hard to say exactly. However, on principle, lying to get someone to do something as personal as have sex with you, is a pretty nasty, selfish thing to do. If the girl was genuine and guillable, you could have really hurt her and why should she forgive you? She may be very disappointed but after a while she will move on and find someone who genuinly likes her and will forget all about you. If the girl isn't actually falling for you, she'll probably be mildly annoyed but move on quickly and she won't so much forgive you but lose interest in you.She may also feel embarassed that she's fallen for a guy who was a fake. As for forgiveness, well that depends on the girl. Like mishmash says, why is forgiveness important? Do you want to remain friends with this girl? Well it is possible, but once you sleep with someone, it changes the dynamic. It may be easy for you to have sex with someone and carry on as if nothing ever happened, but for someone else, they may never want to see that person again because they are ashamed/hurt/disappointed/thinks you are a loser for treating her like that and loses interest in you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2011): I don't think it's a question of wanting forgivness...I think it's a question of disappointed expectations. You wanted sex so badly, you were willing to deceive her and pretend you liked her. She evidently trusted that you did like her and probably wanted a relationship. If she caught on to this deception, then she probably feels hurt, but if she's a smart girl she probably isn't seeking your forgivness either, she's just moved on. When it's happened to me, I usually kick myself for being a sucker and a poor judge of character, but I don't attempt to get an apology out of the guy. And if I do run into him, I'd probably go out of my way to avoid him. Afterall, he wasn't interested in me as a person, so why bother acknowledging him even if he feels like apologizing?Which brings me to my question...if you were only pretending you liked her, why do you care if she forgives you or not?
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (19 March 2011):
 That's never happened to me, if a guy only wanted sex I've usually been able to see straight through it. But I can't take liars. If a guy wants just sex and he is honest about it then that's fine, and maybe we'll have sex. But if a guy has been lying then it's different. But a guy has to be pretty good at acting if he wants to attempt faking chemistry between two people. And I don't have sex until after weeks into an official relationship anyway. So maybe that's why I've stayed clear of being used?
But in any case, to me, the problem wouldn't be that a guy only wanted me for sex, the problem would be if he had been lying to me. I'd not forgive that. I'd not want to be with someone who is fake and makes up lies to people. If they did it to get sex, or anything else for that matter.
So no, I'd not forgive lying and deceiving. I would just loose respect for that person.
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