A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:A few days ago I had a great first date with a guy I met online. We talked for hours then he invited me to his place to hang out a little more. Once we got there of course we ended up making out, but I didn't let things go any further (I had my period) and he didn't pressure me. Today he asked me for a second date and we made a plan to see each other on Saturday. He suggested dinner at his place and I agreed to it. I really like him, so I don't know if its a good idea if I go to his place again. I don't know if he'll think I'm a tease if I go to his place a second time and don't have sex with him (I'd like to have sex with him. I just don't know if its a good idea to now since it's so soon). Should I change the plan and meet somewhere public or just go there and see where things go?
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2015): I don't like people using the term "easy" as an insult, but it's correct in its exact form that you'd be easy to get into bed, if you go to his, but especially if you do have sex this early on.I'm not saying you couldn't last if you have sex this early, but the chances decrease because there's nothing left of you that he hasn't already seen and "conquered" - if that makes sense?It seems like most men (and occasionally women, but much less often) who will have sex (or any form of it) within the first month (or first 5 dates) aren't as interested in the personality afterwards. "Been there, done that" kind of attitude. That's not all of them, but most appear to. Men (and sometimes women) who want quick sex usually won't bother to wait several dates and genuinely get to know the person first.If you're willing to risk your physical mystery disappearing so quickly, that's fine because it's your choice but, if you want him to keep dating you and not expect sex every time from here on out, you're probably better off waiting.
A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (6 August 2015):
I would not go to his place for dinner or otherwise unless you are comfortable with having casual sex with him.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2015): I think its safe to assume as you have already made out on first date, the second date at his place will equal sex! Depends if that's where you want this to go I guess
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2015): This sounds like me from a couple of months ago!!!I recently met a really nice guy on Tinder and had a first date in a pub. It was great, we clicked and I could tell that he was a good egg. The second date was at his flat for dinner and one thing ended up leading to another :P so I'd say its safe to assume that if you go to his place there will be more of an expectation to have sex. I was uncertain at first as it was only the second date, but if you're getting good vibes from him (which you obviously are) then just see what happens :) at the end of the day, fun is fun! If you're wanting to have more time to get to know him before doing the deed though, I'd suggest meeting in a public place. That way you could always go back to his for action if you're keen but also leave your options open. If you're not as bothered, go to his place. All the best of luck - keep us posted :D
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