A
male
age
30-35,
*hemaster25423
writes:My girlfriend and I are both 19 and have been dating for 2 years. We both just completed our first semester of college. The problem is, we made a decision to go to separate colleges back when our relationship was still young. But we know now that we love each other. We are both very mature for our age and have discussed our opinions about marriage and children.But the problem remains, we go to colleges 1.5 hours away from each other and the separation drove us crazy. I can't imagine living another 7 semesters away from her. We are currently attempting to transfer colleges so we can be together. However, the transfer will put us (combined) around 50K in debt after undergrad. If we do not transfer and stay separated, we will be (combined) 20K in debt. We really want to be together and I love her. I know that staying separated will not destroy our relationship. But I still want to be with her and do not want to go through another 3 years of separation. We have explored every financial option possible but loans are the only way to cover our lost scholarships. Please give me your opinion and advice.
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (10 January 2011):
 Well, love conquers all... but debt sucks eternally. If you two have every intention of being together and to have happier lives beyond the next three years, I would suck it up and stay where you are. Being close for the next 3 years may seem like it's worth 30,000, but that is a choice you WILL regret.
My husband and I are currently a 15 hour plane flight away from each other because I am determined to finish my degree. In a week, I'll go back to a freezing cold NY state while he gets to stay in glorious Hawaii. It will be one long semester. But, in the longrun it is the best for us both... and overcoming the challenges of distance will make the relationship stronger in the end. Money isn't everything, but money unfortunately does make a huge impact on your daily lives. The stress of a huge debtload will take it's toll on your relationship.
This next three years will be tough, but it will come with it's own adventures! 1.5 hours to me seems like nothing - you can rendezvous at a halfway point easily. It is survivable! Stick with what you're doing now. Maybe after showing excellent work in school after another semester or two, you can get a scholarship and a transfer! You never know what the future will bring.
Good luck, sweet!
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