A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend have been together a little over a month and he is going through a rough time with family problems. Not to go into detail but hes basicly on his own right now, he has been staying with his grandma so far but he know where hes going after thet. he doesnt have a permanate home and its only been like this a few days but im worried. Hes mentioned going to the army before and i told him no. He said he wouldnt leave me anyways but now because of this im second geussing this. would going to the army be good for him? he would have school there and they would pay for his college and get him away from all this stuff. But do you think he would cheat on me from being away that long? do u think i should tell him too stay or go?!?!?
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (29 January 2012):
 He can join active duty military at 18 (17 he has to have parental consent) with his HS diploma. If he has a GED, they only allow a certain amount of people who posses one of those. Plus he has to pass physical testing and written tests. They don't allow every young man to enlist in the military.
The Army is a good structural program. He can further his career in the Army or when he gets out he'll have a GI bill to attend college with. So it's a good option for him.
Who knows if he'll cheat on you?? Not all military men are faithful to their girlfriends and wives, but neither are civilian men. Sometimes, it's the other way around that military wives and girlfriends hold the cheating stereotype. So if you two have a strong relationship up until he joins, then you have nothing to be worried about.
I wouldn't be so quick to tell him no, because it's not your choice, and you look controlling. You've only been together a month, so calm down.
If your boyfriend is having problems at home, he should discuss it with a counselor at school who can best advise him on his difficult situation.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2012): "would going to the army be good for him?"
It's the world's worst idea to join the army to solve a domestic situation. The situation gets harder to fix because of the distance (both physical and emotional), and yet you need to rely upon your family more because of the extremely stressful first year.
Let's be positive and take the best case. He joins the army, domestic situation becomes bliss. Well he is still in the army, for at least seven years if he wants them to pay for college. Not the best outcome if he hadn't planned on a army career.
But the worst case is that his home life will still suck, he'll be miserable in the army, he will underperform because he really doesn't want to be there, his unit will hate him for the increased risk he brings to the team, and he'll never have his stuff together enough to make the cut for any scholarship.
You should only join the army because you want to make it your career. And sure, use it to advance yourself out of poverty, or to gain an education, or simply because it is family tradition. These things make sense.
But the army will not solve the problems in your domestic life. And army life will often make then a lot worse.
"he would have school there and they would pay for his college"
Go and read the army education website more closely. The army doesn't put it's people through school -- it trains them. This is a very different thing.
There are college scholarships and West Point, but these are aimed at creating officers and the required standard is high to exceptional. If he is bright enough for a college scholarship then the Air Force and Navy also offer scholarships, fully paid with no service obligation if you take a course for a skill they desperately need.
After serving the GI Bill will fund a modest college education.
Many troops pay for a distance education out of their own pocket whilst stationed at home, but this is due to personal motivation.
"...do you think he would cheat on me..."
Actually the concern of deployed troops is that you will cheat on him. So perhaps you should ask yourself if you would be true if he were off the scene for two years.
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A
female
reader, themusicgoddess19  +, writes (29 January 2012):
 You guys are still pretty young. And going into the army can do amazing things in a person's life. I know that I would be terrified if my bo said he wanted to go in to the army, but I would support him in whatever he wanted to do. And if your bo feels something for you, he wouldn't cheat on you. Judging by the amount he was going on in his life, he wouldn't anyway. Have faith, I wish you both the best of luck. (:
3
tje
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