A
female
age
51-59,
*rasaeboe
writes:Does it show some class to write a good testimonial (voucher) for someone you still have feelings for, on a dating site?We ended up being just friends (platonic) since the distance was to hard to maintain any type of intimate relationship. I care for this person alot, and it's hard to let him go, but would it show good faith if I write a good testimonial for him to find his significant other. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, arasaeboe +, writes (19 January 2011):
arasaeboe is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everyone for your feedback. All of your answers made me realize that
by doing this it would probably cause more problems than if i just let it go. thanks again.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2011): I can see that this is your way of fighting to get him back into your arms, whether or not you admit it to yourself just yet.
It's gonna be a heck of a fight and an emotional rollercoaster if you take this on.
Is he worth it? Think before you act. Make sure you can handle it and arm yourself with emotional support from friends, so you can lean on them when it gets painful to stand by and watch.
A toy boy on the side might help :-) Sorry for being blunt, but you have to hang on to your emotional integrity. As long as you don't deliberately mislead someone and hurt their feelings, you're doing the right thing.
I wish you love and happiness in the end, whichever way it turns out to be.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2011): How are you going to feel when he gets into another long distance relationship off your testimonial? what if you find out distance wasn't the issue (probably wasn't for him)? This will just open up a can of worms so you should write your own profile and spend time on that and not on his.
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A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (7 January 2011):
 Quite simply - No. It would put women off rather than helping him to find love. If I saw a man's profile online where an ex had written a comment about how wonderful he is etc I would immediately think 'warning sign - there is still an ex who has feelings for him, best leave this one alone'.
So unless you want to stop him finding love and being happy then dont do it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2011): Since I've never have been on any dating sites, is this a common practice? it sounds strange to me - like writing a letter of recommendation for a job?? Or writing a 'consumer review'?? I'm sorry if I'm demonstrating my ignorance.
if you write a testimonial, doesn't it lead to the question well if he's so great why aren't you still with him or why wasn't he worth fighting for?
did he ask you to do this? or is this your own idea and if so why?
Also if you still have feelings for him, how would you feel if you did write such a glowing letter of recommendation for him, and that helped him find a new girlfriend. Would you be kicking yourself later on?
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (7 January 2011):
 I wouldnt do it, I wouldnt date a man who has a former girlfriend giving testimonials, I would find that kinda off putting.
I certainly wouldn't be doing it for somebody I still had feelings for, why not wear a hair shirt instead and be done with it?
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