A
female
age
30-35,
*iri
writes:My ex and I broke up a couple of months ago, but we still hang out, and talk almost every night. We share lots of laughs and we tend to make out every time we go out. From time to time he'd invite me over to his place and we would even have sex. That bond between us just gets stronger and stronger. I am in love with him and he says that he loves me too. But he will not allow our relationship to be anything more than just friends. He just does not think that he is ready for a relationship right now. His reasons being that he would like to see me almost every day, if we were dating, and he knew that could not happen right now, because we are both busy with school. We currently see each other pretty often, more than we did when we were together, but he always says it's not enough for him. He also believes that if we were to get into a relationship he may not treat me the way he believes i deserve to be treated.He said that it isn't fair for me to wait for him because, i deserve better and he even encourages me to be with other guys as well.But my heart longs for him and not other guys. He is exactly what I've wanted in a guy and i can see myself committing to him in the future. so my question is should i wait or just distance myself from him now to save myself from the heartache?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2011): He's not your friend, because a friend wouldn't treat you like you're only a piece of meat. You're good enough to have sex with but not good enough to be loved. He's disgusting and you're just enabling him to use you up plus he's wanting to have sex with other girls. Do you really want his behavior to put you at a STD risk? Get away from him cause he's messing you about.
A
female
reader, Niri +, writes (1 January 2011):
Niri is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much you guys for the advice. Although i feel like he has control over me it's still so difficult to dislike him or even think badly of him. :(I have stopped having sex with him and have been pulling away from all those intimate moments i seem to find myself in with him. Its gonna be a long process but it has started. I'm hoping that slowly i shall stop hoping for something to happen between us and stop being confused by all his intimate touches. Its still pretty difficult to not talk to him or even long for his touch..cause he's like my closest friend right not but i'm still trying my very best to move on.Its gonna be a super hard process for me to stick to seeing as i feel so much for him but i'm hoping for the best.I think i'll be prepared for other relationship opportunities that may come my way in the future.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2010): I think you should cut contact with him and ignore his calls for around 3 to 4 weeks. Then when he does get through to you after that time , tell him, NO RELATIONSHIP , NO SEX!! then see what he does. He does not want the responsibilty of a relationship, but wants all the benifits and you are letting him get away with it. You need to put your foot down and get tough with him asap, or it could go on and on like this. Just scare him by ignoring him. That way you will find out his true intentions too. x
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