A
male
age
36-40,
*acDaddio
writes: Last night my girlfriend got really upset with about something she messed up. Everything prior to the incident was going well. She spazzed out about the whole situation. Once again it has nothing to do with me. (she locked her iphone, and has to pay additional money monthly until she unlocks it). She went to sleep mad and actually didn't say a word to me, and turned her back on me and when I tried to comfort her about the NOT SO serious incident, she rejected my love. In the morning when I left she still was acting the same as the night before. She called me and I return her call immediately afterwards (3 times)... She didn't call me back. I don't know how to handle the situation. I don't want to aggravate her more, but at the same time I don't want to appear needy or ignoring. How should I handle this situation? Should I wait for her to call me or call her later on and she how she is doing?
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (6 January 2009):
I have found that the best advice in this type of situation is to back away from the person and give them time to get over their anger at themselves. If you put yourself in their path, and they are immature, you risk having them take it out on you, as you have found.
I would also return hostile words with calmness and tranquility. "You seem upset about this iPhone thing. I am sorry for your situation and I hope things work out for you." Then just leave them alone.
Stay calm, don't react to her hyperness with equal energy, instead, stand aside and let it flow past you. If you don't feed that negative energy, it may just dwindle out on its own. Tough to do, I know, but STAY CALM.
I'd wait for her to get in touch. Send her an email saying you'll be there for her when she has settled down and has dealt with the situation.
And don't take that rejection personally. She wasn't rejecting you the person, she was angry at herself and could not let that go at the moment. It would be nice to think that love conquers all, but I think patience actually is the winner here.
Take care.
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