A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my fiancé for 5years. Being financially stable is very important to him. This keeps him from wanting to wait to get married. We attempted to get married 2-3 years ago, but I didn't have any income cause my disability got cut off. So we called it off. We have a daughter and one on the way.I wanted to go back to my religion so. I broke up with him. And he was crushed. He called off the marriage and proposal. Should I understand where he coming from?
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (22 September 2015):
 I'm trying to understand your post before I can offer a comment.
When you said "Being financially stable is very important to him. This keeps him from wanting to wait to get married." Does that mean that he wants to get married as soon as possible? Or that he wants to wait to get married? That's not entirely clear.
You said you attempted to get married but didn't have income due to your disability being cut off. Does that mean he didn't want to marry you because you didn't have an income?
You have one child and another on the way, so you have proceeded with having a family despite the financial concerns.
And now you say you want to return to your religion and so you broke up with him. So if you broke up with him, thus ending the relationship, doesn't that mean that you called off the marriage? He may have retracted his proposal but wasn't that something that was natural as you broke up with him?
I think it would help us to understand where you are coming from if you could explain this just a bit better. It's very confusing. Perhaps I've missed something in reading and re-reading this post but I just don't understand it.
As he is the father of two of your children, I think it would be a good thing if you could understand where he is coming from.
Is your disability making it difficult for you to communicate with him or understand his point of view? Or for you to convey your question more clearly to us?
Thank you in advance for clarifying.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2015): Sounds like he wanted out of his financial responsibility for two kids, if you ask me. In the United States; disability compensation doesn't get cutoff, unless the disability no longer exists, or fraud. Hopefully, you've made a recovery and you're able to work. You're going to need to, if your ex-fiance decided to call off marriage; but didn't use condoms to postpone having a family.
Get your legal ducks in a row. Get child child-support. You're going to need all the help you can get. Prayer will help a lot.
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