A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:During my last summer job (in another city), I met a nice girl who I ended up being friends with. After the job I moved back for school and still talk to her to her occasionally online. But I've also had a crush on her but never told her how I feel because we were working together and because she did mention having a boyfriend (although I'm not sure how serious their relationship is). I figured the feelings would disappear after I leave but they haven't and I don't know what to do. Should I tell her how I feel, even though we live in different cities, or just let it go?
View related questions:
crush Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (28 January 2009):
 I'd make a really good attempt to go see her in person. spend the day with her and near the end of the day see how you feel about there then. If you sense that it's strong from her as well I'd so one of these:
1) just take a moment look in her eye and slowly move in to kiss her if she asks what's going on just appologise and say you didn't know what got I to you and that you are sorry. It depends on how close you both are already for how she will take It and how quick she'll accept your applogy.
2) Sit close to her and break it out to her like this: say "I just want you to know I really like being your friend... But I've also developed feelings for you and I just want to tell you and see if you feel the same way about me too? if you don't that's cool I just wanted to know that's all." - of course this will depend on things like your body language (make sure your facing her Nd look her in the eye but do t stare, smile and be honest with her - don't think to much about the body language though just relax and. Take it easy with her. if it positive she will signal you by moving closer and she will blush and smile. and that's when you should kiss her. If negative she will look a little worried be aide she will feel uncomfortble about know king you back, so the best thing you can do is make her relax and reassure her it's all cool and that you want to be friends and they you mean it. the more your cool about being knocked back the easier it will be on you both.
Other than that it's really hard to say because I don't really know her however it should give you enough to guide on. I hope you get her but if not promise her that you would still like to be friends and maintain that with her.
Let me know how you go.
Cheers.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the reply, I've been trying to figure out what to say exactly but I keep getting the fact that we may end up not being friends anymore in my head. The biggest thing that's keeping me from saying anything to her is that we don't even live in the same city and she's even moving further away (international) for a year soon. Any ideas on what I can say without completely ruining the friendship?
...............................
A
male
reader, Griffo +, writes (11 January 2009):
If you've built a good solid friendship with her and you really like her a lot take the next step and tell her you like her and your feelings (try to tell her in person). If you really like her, its worth knowing that you gave it a try otherwise you will always live in wonder about her. Especially if she's the rare "golden" fish in the sea that's has your heart.
If it dosen't work out, just say to her that you wanted to know thats all and then let it go. From then on just continue being her friend, never bring it up again, even if she asks you - let her make the moves after this. She might build up a love for you too, just never pester or push her after you have told her. She will always remember that you liked her and she will see that you have respected her decision by being her friend. She might even build somthing for you overtime too. You would have planted a seed by doing this, now let it grow.
This will take time, but good luck mate :)
...............................
|
