A
male
age
30-35,
*lleryforreal2
writes:im an 19 year old male and i live in Miami and recently my Cuban neighbor's have a few relatives move in from Cuba and one of them is this girl she is 18, and every time i go out she usually whistles at me to get my attention, i didn't really look back because i thought it wasn't for me. but one day i was washing my car and she came up to me and asked for my number and ever since then we have been talking. the problem is that she has a boyfriend that lives here in miami the thing is she dosnt see him as a boyfriend she told me that she knew him from cuba for like 4 years and she feels bad to tell him no. and she likes me alot so she says but i get jealous every time the boyfriend comes over because he stays for like 4 hours then i cant see her that day and she cant see me during the day because her parents might think she is going out with that guy so they might think bad about her. so the question is should i go up to the guy and tell him that she doesn't like him she likes me and that he should go away and let us be together ???
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male
reader, elleryforreal2 +, writes (10 March 2009):
elleryforreal2 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey thx peter pan. yea we had sex for the first time like 2 weeks ago and she says i love you and all that stuff oh she also says that supposedly she doesn't do anything sexual with him . its hard to believe but i am giving her the benefit of the doubt. ...then the other day i asked her when you kiss your "boyfriend" do you kiss him the same way you kiss me ? she says not with the same feelings .. she is still with her boyfriend. i am trying not to get emotionally attached i am going to try to see her as a friend with benefits.
A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (6 March 2009):
 Honestly, no -- do not approach this "boyfriend", even if she says he's not a "boyfriend". In all honesty, you can't solve her problems for her. She needs to come clean with this guy and tell him like it is. You do not need to be getting in the middle of all this... because if you've never actually spoken with this guy, you don't know if she's stringing you along and trying to get you to do her dirty work for her. Something like this happened to me once; I was relying on somebody to tell me if this girl was available. Turns out that she was trying to use me for the summer while her real boyfriend was out of town.
Bottom-line, don't get in the middle of something between another couple. You're getting one side of the story here. You could go off acting like the knight in shining armor and be opening a can of worms you have no clue about. Let her ditch him then come to you clean with no baggage.
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