A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hello,I live in a students residence. I was trying to sleep, but I heard some noises coming from my neighbor's room. We don't know each other, never met. I am not sure if he is having sex with someone, or his bed is just very squeaky somehow, or he's using some kind of tool to cut something.. there are no voices, just this weird noise that stops from time to time and then comes back.. It's kind of uncomfortable and also bothering me from sleeping.. Should i talk to him in the morning, having in mind we never met at all? This is a weird situation i have never been part of and i dont know what the social protocol is .. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2020): I once had a neighbor move in upstairs from me. Right away in the middle of her first week there it was so loud with jumping and stomping noises that I could not sleep. And I had to work the next day.
So I went upstairs, half asleep, to ask them to keep the noise down. I knocked, and to my surprise, a herd of small children opened the door. They were very happy to see me and hugged my legs and squealed in delight, yet I was shocked and confused that all these toddlers were still awake at 11 pm. I saw a few girls my age sitting together in the back of the room, but none came over.
Finally an older lady came up to the door to greet me, and I asked her politely to keep the noise down, at least in the bedroom, since I had to work the next day and the noise was loud. She said she would, and she did.
The next day I saw her again, and she thanked me profusely for coming up to talk to her first, and not calling the office or anything. Also, because my "visit" gave her an excuse to have her daughters and grandchildren go home!
We got along great after that, she was a great neighbor & friend.
So yes, go talk with him. Give people a chance before you just stew in resentment of them, without really knowing why. He may even be a friend waiting to happen, you never know.
Best,
R
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2020): Nothing ventured, nothing gained. You can politely approach your neighbor, and tell him you are sometimes disturbed by noises at night coming from his place. Describe it as intermittent squeaking that keeps you awake. You'd appreciate anything he could do to fix or adjust it. Be pleasant, but not intimidated. Don't cop an attitude, and expect cooperation from anyone.
Now this is the reality of things. At this point, you will have addressed the problem; and inadvertently, you'll become acquainted with your neighbor. Complaints are not the best way to introduce yourself. Bring an offering, like some home-baked cookies or fudge. It is my assumption he will be embarrassed, if it's his bed making that noise. He will promptly make some adjustments; because whatever he is doing, he wouldn't want you to hear it! It could also be his exercise equipment. Which means it will be in frequent use; but he can always reposition the machine or equipment away from adjoining walls.
Then on the other-hand, he may instead become embarrassed and defensive; thus, take the stance that you're a nosy and intolerant neighbor. He may become even noisier out of spite. My suggestion is to be prepared. Get yourself some noise-cancelling headphones. If you can reposition your bed away from the adjoining wall, do that too. You'll have to have a backup-plan; because people take offense to complaints, no matter how much in the wrong they are. It's just human-nature. Not meaning that as an excuse; but as a realistic observation through experience, and knowing my fellow human-beings. Hope for the best, and prepare for worse.
Comeback, and please let us know how it all works-out. God bless!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (7 June 2020):
 I also agree if this is EVERY night, go ask him if he can figure a way to keep the squeaking down a little. It is annoying, but if you approach him in a nice fashion I don't think he will take offense. If it's a once in a while I think you might have to suck it up. You are not going to have peace and quiet living in student residence.
If you do talk to him be aware that he might not be able to fix it. So if that doesn't work, earplugs might be another option.
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A
male
reader, Justryingtohelp  +, writes (7 June 2020):
Was this a solitary one off or is it a regular thing? I would let the occasional noise pass but say something if it becomes a regular occurrence. Keep it friendly and light as falling out with neighbours who live in close proximity rarely ends well. Remember your neighbours have as much right to be there as you do. You could always buy yourself some ear plugs.
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (7 June 2020):
 It's a tricky one really. I think if the noise was loud thumping music going on into the early hours, or an aspiring drummer practicing at night time that went on for a number of weeks is when i would go over and say something.
I assume as you are in a students residence he would not be doing DIY jobs in his room, so think we can rule out his cutting anything with a tool.
I think maybe he is just a noise person, maybe not mindful that other students are close by trying to sleep.
Why don't you try maybe getting some ear plugs and see how that goes.
If it gets to much, maybe talk to the halls of residence and see if you can get a room swap.
But bear in mind if you did get a room swap and you were next to someone playing loud music, you may think it was not so bad where you was in the first place.
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