A
female
age
30-35,
*hageRita
writes:i meet this person on the internet he seems sweet he wants to start talking on the phone but i never been in a relationship before a guy never even looked at me that way so i don't know what i should do, what if he doesn't want a relationship and he just wants friendship. can u help me what should i do, should i talk to him on the phone?
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female
reader, RhageRita +, writes (8 February 2010):
RhageRita is verified as being by the original poster of the questionim 19 and he 25 and thank u all 4 your answers they all helped me think, he said there is no pressure to call him i can take my time we also live in same state,different citys
A
male
reader, tomm_00  +, writes (8 February 2010):
well ive never done internet dating before but if he wants to talk to you over the phone that to me means that he wants to get to know you more, most probly for a relation ship, but remember you need to talk to someone before you casn get closer :) good look with it email me with how it goes XD
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2010): If you dont know if he wants friendship or relationship, why not just ask him?
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A
female
reader, Lexie88  +, writes (8 February 2010):
 How old are you and how old does he say he is? How long have you been chatting online. You can meet some lovely people online but like with everything else, there are people out there who want to hurt you.
Do you feel safe giving him your number? If so, make a time for him to call you. Tell him you have an appointment later on so that your conversation doesn't drag on for too long if it doesn't go well.
Spend some time getting to know him over the phone...listen to his tone of voice and listen for any inconsistencies in the things he says. Does he talk about the same things as he did in the emails?
Treat him as a friend at this stage. He might want a relationship but it might not work out that way, so don't get your hopes up too high. Talk as you would with a friend.
If you're comfortable enough at a later stage, meet up...in a public place during the day of course.
Treat this as just meeting another friend. Don't assume he'll be your boyfriend or that he will fall for you. That will only set you up for disaster.
He likes you so far to have suggested you talk on the phone. If you feel comfortable and you also want to, there isn't any harm in having a chat with him.
Just put all your expectations on hold and enjoy the friendship for now. It may or it may not turn into something more but there's no use in worrying about that now. And if you start worrying it will show in your actions and the things you say...and that's always a turn off. Just be yourself like you've been up to now and you should be ok.
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A
female
reader, BeckieMu +, writes (8 February 2010):
Relationships are very different offline than they are online.
Imagine if this led to a relationship where your friends went out with your man and yours could only be contacted VIA phone or screen.
This man might be sweet, but I promise you, you wont know him until you actually meet (not that this is an encouragement to meet him just food for thought.)
There are many men out there who would love you that you just havent met you so please consider everything.
However there is no reason other than your own choice not to talk to him on the phone and choice is really what this situation is about, more specifically yours.
Yes some people may say its dangerous or "not real" but that really is for you to decide. Perhaps ask him why he wants to talk to you to make sure you are on the same wavelength, tell him that you feel nervous too. Honesty always works but whatever choice you make Good luck and be safe!
and never let anyone pressure any details/information out about you, you dont want! x
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A
female
reader, purpleprincess +, writes (8 February 2010):
Yeah I think its very good to get to know someone over the phone before you meet. It allows you to talk bout the things you may struggle to establish face to face. I talked to my fiance about 8months before we even met. When we finaly met I felt we already had a conection and so did he. We have been together 7yrs now and have 3beutiful chidren. Make sure you are safe tho as a lot of predators online who may say they are someone they are not. Don't give address out etc till you know them properly and meet in a busy place for the first time maybe movies etc. Good look xx
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