A
female
age
36-40,
*han25
writes:i have been with my boyfriend for six months and he decided it was over because he said he was tried of the arguements. i called him to apologise but he gave me the cold shoulder and said we will never get back together. he left on monday and today saturday he came to get his clothes from my place and we made out and he said we could try and start over as friends first and if it happen it happens. so my question is what should i do?
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male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (15 November 2009):
 Did he take his clothes with him?
Few guys would not try the "lets be friends with benefits" routine. Just make sure you don't end up being just there for sex on the side.
NEVER think that sex has ANY meaning to a guy beyond "I like sex". We can hate your guts and still have sex.
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (15 November 2009):
 Sounds like he broke rule # 1 of breaking up. "If you want closure, start with your legs." Making out with you rekindled his feelings for you, because there is a connection between sex and love. Since you want him back, your goal is to build on that as much as possible, without letting him take advantage of you. You need to build nonsexual love as well. Building slow is all well and good, as long as he doesn't get bored and start wandering.
FA
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A
male
reader, Roboaxe +, writes (15 November 2009):
 If it happens it happens?Sounds to me as if he wants a friend with benefits now, not a girlfriend. Be careful with him. If nothing happens within 2 weeks of you seeing each other, nothing will happen. I hope this helps!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2009): if you try and start over as friends then that definitely means no making out, otherwise he will have no incentive to get back together with you, dont get into a friends with benefits situation as you will be the one who gets hurt when you realise that he wants to keep his freedom whilst keeping you there on a string for his own benfit only.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (15 November 2009):
 From what you have told us, I would say the relationship sounds pretty dead, but not yet buried, the last making out session was just a result of charged emotions, I think you should just get on with your life and if you were arguing too much be sure to work out what part you played in that, and try and modify your behaviour so that it doesnt happen again in the next relationship
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