A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I have been in a relationship with a guy who I work with for nearly a year now. He tells me he loves me and would do anything for me - probably the sweetest guy I have ever met. BUT - I don't find him attractive enough. I don't really fancy him like I have fancied my other boyfriends. What should I do? I know that I won't find anyone who treats me as good as he does, as most guys in my experience are a-holes, but at the same time I just can't see him in my future. I'm also so terrified of breaking his heart, which I know I will do. And I work with him, so can't do it whilst we work together. Should I stay with him cos I won't find anyone who will treat me any better? Please help!
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male
reader, rodent man +, writes (5 February 2009):
From a mans point of view i think he will be gutted to know that you dont find him attracive enough or dont see your future with him. It will take time for him to get over it--and the old adage of time is a great healer is very very true. That leads me to the point---you have to tell him---at the right time and in the right place, but you just have to tell him Its not fair on both of you, as you continue to not be sure and he goes along thinking all is ok.In time he will look back and think yes it was the right thing to do, but if he really does love you--then prepare for some upset and tears--deep down i think you know this is the right thing to do.As for work, well if its easy enough to find another job ( doubtful) then consider that, otherwise u will have to grin and bear it---Hope it all works out and its not too painful
A
female
reader, kellyxxx +, writes (5 February 2009):
the stability in this relationship sounds very appealing however if you dont crave stability then you should leave!whats the point of spending time with someone who you cant see in your future? life is too short. follow your heatr and i wish you good luck. keep me updated. x
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