A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I’m having the most difficult time understanding this man right now. It seems that the more we see each other or the closer we seem to get, the more distant he becomes and the less he initiates conversation or even responds to my text and phone calls. While I would normally take this as a sign to back off he still seems eager to meet up (often coming early and leaving later than plan), has ditched his good friends for me, will get jealous when I talk to other men or speak about other men, will occasionally text me while he works (he works a lot), seems to truly care about my feelings, somewhat protective, flirty touches and compliments, talk about our future together, and has remembered small things that I liked and brought them as gifts. At first I chalked it up to being a cultural difference (he’s from S. Korea) as to why we arent seeing eye-to-eye, but I’m not so sure anymore. This summer we will be traveling and working quite a bit, so meeting up may not be an option. Should I simply back off or try to pursue this further? I’m afraid that I’ll scare him away and I can’t tell whether or not he’s actually attracted to me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@ Zayla80: ...I'd just like to add that when we meet he usually takes the lead, not me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@ Zayla80: I agree with most of what you said. Usually I don't call or text first, in fact in almost every case the guy was lead the relationship while I was somewhat distant,bitchy, or mysterious. But in those cases I usually didn't like the guy. However this guy is painfully shy and I really trully like the guy, which I think is making me "all your cards out on the table". I understand what oyu mean though, I'm defiantely backing off for awhile. If it works out, great. If not, well then, I guess its time to move on.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2010): He is the man therefore you should allow him to pursue you. Love is not as complicated as people like to make it out to be...it's very simple. If a person is interested in you they will SHOW that they are. If they are not, they will SHOW that they are not. Stop texting and calling him first--let him do the texting and calling. Let him PURSUE you. Also, be mysterious, don't put all your cards out on the table, don't be so available all the time to him. Time tells all let me tell you, and if this guy is truly interested in you, time will let you know as well as his actions. I think you should read a book by Sherry Argov called WHY MEN LOVE BITCHES.
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female
reader, Lakisha +, writes (14 May 2010):
 Hi I would say don't call him or text him if he realizes it he'll respond to u if he has any intrest in u I had that same problem would love to tell it to u
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